Hi all... I feel like I can express my feelings of anxiety about our puppy here and welcome any thoughts of advice...sorry for the long post. It has been over 20 years since I have had a puppy and back then I lived in an area where the dog/puppy lived outside the house so it was a whole different experience. Older dog (10 1/2 year old male) still barks, growls and snaps at the puppy when he is being a puppy, we are doing a lot of "time outs" for separation in the evenings. We are on our 5th week of them being together.. will it ever get better? the stress of this is brutal Crate training- Jaks will sleep in a soft sided crate in our bedroom all night, no whining or agitation unless he needs to go out, but wants nothing to do with the hard sided crate downstairs. We try feeding, treating, sitting next to it.. all the tricks.. he never lays down. When we leave the house we are putting him in the kitchen with a baby gate. I tried putting the crate in the kitchen with him when I left yesterday... he went in it, just to pee!!! He was doing great with house training until a couple days ago, he seems to have regressed. We are getting another crate, a wire cage type on Friday and going to try to get him converted to this one over the weekend by starting out next to our bed then possibly sleeping downstairs with him at night for a while. We really want to make this work!! Treats-- we have YET to find a treat that he really likes, other than diced up turkey, which we are trying to limit to use during clicker training. We have stuffed kongs, but he doesn't have much interest. The only thing that he seems to want to chew on for long periods of time is one of his beds.. he can chew on the corner of that for 10-15 minutes at a time. Any advice? Meals- He hasn't adopted the typical lab appetite. He will eat a little walk away for a while, eat a little more, walk away for a while, etc... maybe he doesn't LOVE the food we are feeding him? I have actually started feeding him part of his meals by hand, I have been told that this helps with bonding and also the nipping at my hands. Biting/nipping-- We want him to learn bite inhibition so for hard bites at our ankes/feet we tried the re-direct/ yelping/ saying ouch and being a tree... none seem to work. Now about me.. I feel like I am carrying 80% of the responsibility for this little guy. I get up with him when he wakes up, about 4:30-5:00 AM, which is fine, I am an early riser. I do the morning feeding, training, play etc.. Plop him in his pen for about an hour while I get ready for work then take a short walk to relieve him before I head to the office for a few hours, we want him to feel ok being left alone a few hours of the day. I come home, take him out and play for a bit then finish my work day. Husband comes home around 3:30 or 4:00 then the chaos ensues with the two dogs. I am really feeling like we are doing many things wrong, yet Jaks seems to be a happy puppy, though does bark/whine/howl a bit when we first put him in his pen or kitchen. He does this for about 5-10 minutes then settles down. Am I totally overthinking and stressing about things too much? We have taken a 4 week puppy class and start a basic manners 8 week basic manners course this week. The crate training and older dog issues are my biggest concerns. My husband said that I am over obsessing and need to relax, just haven't found a way to do this yet would help to know that I am not alone.
Here's my 2 cents on several of your issues: biting/nipping --it's a lab and you'll need to deal with it for a bit longer, maybe till 6 months. Ours went at our ankles and feet for about a month before he moved onto something else. Get a variety of chew toys. The cheapest for us was a piece of rope knotted up we made ourselves. He worked on that for weeks. treats -- given the eating habit you'll need to experiment. Try stuffing your kongs with raw ground turkey then freeze. Better yet, chuck the kibble and go completely on a raw diet. older dog -- well, you've invaded his life with something that's getting lots of attention. I'd be upset too if I were him. stress -- you've got a child and all the stress that comes with it. Everyone here will tell you that it will get better. Before that happens resist the temptation at self medicating.
Hi there, sounds like you are going through a stage of the 'puppy blues', the bit where you think 'what was I thinking, getting a puppy...' He sounds absolutely fine to me, and I guarantee you things will start getting better soon. With regard to your older dog, as Jaks stops biting and being a general pain, your older boy will become much more tolerant of him. In the meantime, make sure the older dog has a safe place to retreat to. Also make sure you spend time alone with your older dog, and give him lots of affection, so he doesnt get jealous of the attention lavished on the puppy. The crate... Why exactly does he need to be in a crate, if he hates it so much? If he sleeps well in the soft-sided crate in your bedroom, then that's where I would leave him for now. Some dogs just hate the hard-sided crate. And if he is ok in the kitchen with a baby gate, perhaps that is ok as a long-term solution. Treats and appetite - some labradors are just not great eaters. I had one like that too. It could be he really isn't terribly keen on kibble; or possibly you are feeding him a little more than he really needs? The main thing about his food is just put it down, and take it away after 5-10 minutes. You can try putting a bit of (non-salty) stock on his kibble to make it taste better. Biting and nipping - ah yes. The crocopup stage... it is really hard, I do remember. But he must be around 13 weeks old, right? Most puppies stop the awful biting once their new teeth start coming in, at around 16 weeks. So hang in there. You are doing all the right things. Yes it does sound as though you are doing a lot of the work with him. Either you are ok with that, or you will have to address it with your husband! Having a puppy is a lot like having a baby in the house, and can cause a surprising amount of friction. My OH and I never argue - except about the dog!!! Do try to relax a bit. You are doing just fine. Jaks sounds lovely; just try to go with the flow a little bit. In a few weeks this will all seem like a horrible dream. You are not alone - we've all been through it, and come out the other side with a lovely, nice-natured, house-trained, non-biting dog.
Hi Jo, nothing wrong with long posts and it does sometimes help to get things down in black and white. For me it starts getting things back in perspective - and I guess my first response is No, you're not doing everything wrong. Books often give different advice on raising your pup, and then there's what works for you, your family and your puppy. I'll try to cover each of your bulleted points as far as I can. I've never introduced a puppy into a household with a resident dog but everything I've read is that what you are experiencing is normal and will gradually settle down. Your older dog needs space and time away from the puppy and time with you without the puppy around. As far as older dogs are concerned, puppies can be a real pain and will tell them off accordingly. As long as it's only noise you shouldn't need to worry. I only ever used one crate for Juno, the wire type, which she slept in upstairs at night and we brought down for use during the day. It might be better to focus on using one crate to establish that this is the den/sleeping place. I wouldn't worry too much about a few accidents as it isn't unusual to have little set backs. Just make sure you use an enzyme cleaner after any accidents. I only used a portion of kibble taken out of daily rations for Juno as treats. her favourite toy when she was little was a kong ribbed teether which she would chew for ages. Generally I wouldn't advise feeding by hand as I think it is more likely to cause eating problems rather than curing them. You could try adding a little warm water to the kibble as this improves the smell which some dogs prefer. I don't know whether it improves bonding and prevents nipping; I woud guess that you won't get nipped while feeding but that doesn't necessarily mean you don't have a crocopup. it is important though to teach your pup to take treats etc. gently so hand feeding isn't necessarily all bad Biting/nipping I would say agree on one strategy i.e. having a toy which is placed in puppies mouth rather than your fingers, ankles etc as consistency is key to living through the crocopup phase. It does end, honestly, but at the time seems never ending. Training with our puppies is all about consistency, consistency and consistency and you get there in the end I totally sympathise on feeling as if you are raising the pup alone. We brought Juno home on the Saturday afternoon and on the Monday evening my OH was of to the ferry port for an overnight ferry to the UK not returning 11 nights. Getting up at night can be hard, but thankfully it is quite a short period in the scale of things. The upside was a puppy that was and is very closely bonded to me. She adores OH, but she is very much my dog. What is about OH bringing chaos into the house. Juno can be nice and relaxed and calm and yet 5 minutes with OH has her acting like a loon Try to relax and enjoy your puppy days, they don't last long you really are ding absolutely fine
Hi, I'd just echo what Karen says but wanted to respond so you know all of this is totally normal and it does get better. Those first couple of months are so hard and the lack of sleep doesn't help. Have read or search through the forum if you are having a really tough time with something, chances are someone (or many of us) has had the same issue and you really do get some great tips and support on here. Re the kong, are you freezing it? My girl won't bother with her long if it's frozen but if it's just stuffed with stuff she'll throw it round the room for ages The nipping for me was the hardest, I felt that I was giving everything and couldn't understand why she was attacking me so much. Keep doing what you are doing (ouch to mark the moment and withdraw all attention for a minute or so). And again as you are doing by swapping the bed for a toy she can chew. Tatti has chewed up so many beds she went for a while with nothing but a woolen picnic blanket. We must have bought 7 or 8 different beds, even the indestructible ones didn't stand a chance. Luckily this has now stopped, although we go through Her toys like crazy- she puts all her focus on destroying them. I do worry about this sometimes but at least it's not our furniture any more ;-) There's a great sticky that talks about some common problems at the top of the puppy forum I think- check tht out too. Mostly just keep it up and don't worry, it will get better and you'll look back and miss all the gorgeously cute things they do as a puppy too
http://thelabradorforum.com/threads/puppy-problems-will-things-ever-improve.1680/ Hopefully this works
Thank you so very much! It did help to get it down on paper and I so appreciate your insight! I have good and bad days/moments. I think if I didn't have to work full time it would be different. Even though I am able to work from home, I still have to work. I know it will get better and I don't want to sound like I don't love the little guy, I do.. it is just much more difficult than I ever imagined.
Thank you very much for the very thoughtful response, just knowing I am not alone is helping. I am home now, happily came home to no accidents and Jaks is scouring the room for his next toy (victim). I know it will get better, otherwise there would be no adult dogs in the world. I think I get myself psyched out reading everything on the internet and in books, they all make it sound so damn easy!
and when it all seems a little too much you certainly wouldn't be the first member to have a glass of wine
It's a bit like baby books, all sounds very easy until you discover that your baby/puppy hasn't read the book There is lots of help and experience here on the forum, and if we don't have the experience we can at least offer support
T Thank you so much for your reply. He will be 12 weeks old this sunday. He was just under 7 weeks when we got him, which we were not aware would be the case, thought he was going to be just under 8 weeks. Not that the age matters, but I have heard/read that the longer they are with their mothers & Littermates the better they learn better manners. Funny.. we never had children and have been married for 15 years, this is by far our most challenging experience since being together We are going to bring in a behavior specialist to try to help the older dog and puppy get along better. We have been told that the issues can be corrected. Again, thanks for the kind words
Hi there , I've nothing to add to what @MaccieD and others have said re advice etc . You are definitely not alone in feeling stressed and at times overwhelmed by everything to do with pup . It really really does get better though We brought Sam home to a house with an existing 11 yr old dog who is rather grumpy and set in her ways . Sam is now 5 months and we still make sure older dog gets alone time( including proper grown up walks) . If Sam isn't trying to hump her , he's stealing her chews or badgering her to play . Older dog does now enjoy snuggling with him for naps and will play for a while before letting him / me know she's had enough. So hang in there it'll be grand eventually and until then there is wine
Hi there,you've had some really thoughtful and comprehensive replies ,I just didn't want to pass your post without commenting .Dexter is our first dog so I can't help with any advice on introductions between puppy and an established dog but many of the Forum members have managed it successfully .Reading their experiences it does seem that time will be your friend ,so hang in there ,puppy hood is intense! Just a thought ,are you freezing your kongs? if Jaks isn't interested they could be too hard /and or difficult for him to get along with,starting them off unfrozen might help? Best Wishes
Thank you for the support and kind words! I am smart and accomplished in my career and cannot believe this little ball of fur is getting the best of me. I think it would all be a lot better if I didn't think my older dog was under so much stress, I feel like we turned his world upside down and that is the hardest part.
Hello! I most certainly am grateful for all the wonderful replies. I am sure time will make it get better, at least I am praying that it does. Thanks for the advice on the Kongs, maybe I will try un-freezing them and see if that helps.
It's amazing how wee fur balls can turn us into emotional wrecks , just go with the flow, it does settle down xx Sam & Caoimhe snuggling , you too will have this soon
@Sammyboy Lovely photo of Sam and Caoimhe. Can't remember if you told us or not, but what breed is Caoimhe, and we need more photos
Hi sorry I can't help with the older dog issue as I only have one dog, but he is about a week older than Jaks, so I know what you mean...it is unbelievable hard work. My boy slept well in his crate during the night but hated it during the day - I have now put the crate away as he is a good sleeper and happiest on his large cushion bed at night, next to our bed (although he has a habit of going under the bed to try to eat the legs!). I take comfort from the posts of those more experienced with puppies than me and the fact that everyone says it does get better....counting down to that, although from the crocopup we have had for the last two days I guess teething is starting better start looking back on some of the previous threads about this! Good luck and try and enjoy your little furry bundle x
