Atemas, in the first month we got Harley I would watch videos about why people got/loved labs over and over again on Youtube. Kind of brain washing myself into believing it will get better and we will also have a lab that is loyal and reliable, not destructive and a crocodile with fur. Breathe in..."It will get better" breathe out We are here for you.
It will get better, then you'll find yourself with another steady, lovely Lab - and miss the puppy days!
I'm having one of those days and Bessie is almost nine months old. Sorry, that probably doesn't make you feel better! I trained her to use the "doggie doorbells." Hung them by the door. Trained "touch" in general (though this is not reliable by any means), then did "touch" with a treat by the bells. Did that for a couple of days before we went out to pee together and she caught on fast. Problem is now she rings them even if she's just come inside ten minutes earlier, and I don't have any sense of whether she's gone or not because she goes out off-leash by herself mostly now (this may change as spring arrives). But it was super easy to train. Way easier than I thought.
This is interesting. We watched a documentary about puppies (general breeds) but one of the families did this too and it worked well (considering TV editing) for them. DH was very keen on trying it for Harley but I was just so negative that I didn't believe that it would work so we never bothered. I did read up and there was training for different types of ringing and it sounded quite complex to me. Considering we couldn't even get her be peaceful for a moment without biting us all the time. I thought it would be too steep a hill to climb. But it may be a thing to reconsider now that she is older and more reasonable. Thanks for the reminder.
I'm having a bad day too. Finn's got a great temperament otherwise, but he's just go-go-go and as his sole caretaker I'm feeling pretty discouraged. I called a well-regarded trainer in my area to inquire about a board and train while I'm away next month. I told her about Finn and she was like "You've got your work cut out for you!" and was suggesting that to deal with his antics I'd have to constantly be getting him worn out..... I'd have to take him to dog daycare every other day or send him on puppy excursions twice a day, etc. And when I described his whining she said it sounds like he's looking for things to do....even though I have been doing my utmost to work with him with training and exercise and puzzle toys and also try to maintain a balance in my life. And she said it would be a lifetime of taking him to classes and agility and everything. She was very nice on the phone and I might schedule a private session with her to suss her out, but still. I wanted a companion, not a full time job as professional dog exhauster. I'm going to end up resenting him if I feel like I'm only working to make him tired constantly, feeling like if I miss a walk or a day he's going to be going nuts. That is NOT fun to me at all. I enjoy him and really like taking him around and hanging out with him, but I can only do so much. If I had an OH or family around to help it might be a different story but with just me? I don't even quite work full time and I feel like I'm drowning. I can't afford to send him to dog daycare all the time, it's very expensive and I just did not think that would be a thing I would have to budget for in having a dog as I'm home quite a bit. My job is kind of shaky right now, being self employed it has it's ups and downs and right now it's in a down. So that's stressful enough. Add in a demanding puppy and I'm just about at the end of my rope. Part of me is seriously wondering if this is a mismatch He might have a happier life in a larger family or a family with another dog to play with or...? I don't know.
Finn is about five months now, right? Do you do any "quiet time" training? Just hanging out and doing nothing? Stopping on a walk to sit on a park bench and watch the world go by for a few minutes? "Doing nothing" can be trained just as well as "doing something" can. You don't have to wear your dog out to get them to do nothing. Yes, the whining could very well be that he wants something to do, but sometimes it's just tough. Willow used to be a frustration whiner, and if it wasn't her turn to do something, she'd start, so I built up the time of her being expected to do nothing but sit and watch and now she's happy to do that, even when there's something exciting going on that she's not involved in. It's just another facet of training.
I've implemented a training stage where I have him go to his bed and I treat him while I do things like sit on the couch, move around, etc. I haven't expanded it to very long time periods because I just want him to get it hammered in that the bed is a great place. And I can slowly see him defaulting to his bed during downtime. On walks he's actually been amazing, even at the off leash hike areas. He will just sit when I stop to do something. Today I stopped on our off leash walk to text my cousin, and looked down and he was just sitting there at my feet, waiting for the next move. I think his whining is frustration whining. He does it in his crate when I'm in the apartment, and does it in the car (I think because he feels "confined" in the back seat). I have NEVER reinforced it, so I'm surprised it hasn't lessened more in the last few weeks. Funny, right after I typed that he is being a gem, sleeping in his bed next to me while I work. I had thought things were improving with him, however the call with the trainer suddenly made me feel so overwhelmed because she made it seem like I was going to have to be constantly working him out. But maybe it's because she hasn't worked with him directly and she's picturing her "worse case" dogs. I don't think he's a worst case. Also, as I was on the phone with her listening to that, I was watching Finn take the stuffing out of one of his toys and dancing around in the fluff all over the room.... I've been doing so much with him, and I've seen improvements. In fact, I had him over at my friend's house to play with her dog while we cooked for a group, and he was a star. I brought his crate in the car because last time when he got overtired he turned into a bitey crocodile and wouldn't leave the other dog alone. But this time he mellowed out when he got tired and acted super calm. I was like "Who's dog are you???" Maybe my vent was a little overdone. The trainer just made it seem overwhelming! I am finally bonding with him a bit and seeing his personality. I really want this to work!
Ah, that sounds a bit more positive. I think he's just a normal five-month Lab puppy who doesn't realise it's not all about him just yet. He will, and he'll settle down and you'll be fine. There's a lot of micro-managing at this stage - even in training him to not be micro-managed, but it'll get better
Hope you are feeling differently today. No advice but feel your despondency and that downing feeling is really horrible.
For the past few weeks, I have been getting up twice in the night to take Red outside. She either wee's or poo's, sometimes both. We start our day at 6.00 in our house, so we are coming down to a clean crate which is great and gets the day off to a good start. As we are up early, we are generally exhausted and ready for bed ourselves at 9.00 pm. Dependent on the last wee or poo, I set my alarm approximately 4 hours e.g. 1.00 and 4.00. I am happy to do this but yesterday, someone I was speaking to (not a person with experience of dogs) was appalled and said I was storing up huge problems for the future and that I would always be getting up. Red doesn't bark so I have to judge when she needs to go. During the day, I am getting in tune with her need to go and she has started going to the back door at times which is very good. Means I need to watch her carefully at times but fair play. As I am so tired since bringing Red home, I fluctuate from knowing I am doing the right things to questioning my judgement. This person's comments upset me. I know I need to span out the times during the night but she doesn't seem ready for this just yet. Whilst I generally feel confident we will get there, I suppose I am looking for assurance what is happening is ok or is this person right?
The person is wrong. If Red is not barking then, when his bladder is mature, he will sleep. Mollie has tended to be an early walker for her first poo - I've found that putting her last meal later helps (as she doesn't have a poo after her evening meal). Experimenting with evening meal ad bed time can help. Once Red is five months old I'd try a later bed time and no get up in the night - see what happens. It's a good idea to get them to wee on command so that you can be sure they've had one just before bed. Mollie will squeeze one out for me any time now (at home, she's the first pup I've had who is not happy weeing anywhere but home) Poos need to be nice and firm for them to hold them until morning, pro fibre and/or smaller meals helps if they are not. In my experience (six pups including my own, Tatze) they are all different. But if they are happy to be left and sleep - and don't shout for attention - then all is well ...
You are not storing up issues for the future. Puppies all mature at different rates, Bailey for example never needed to go outside in the night, my sisters boy needed to go out twice a night for quite a while, then dropping to once a night - the point to note here is that my brother-in-law is an insomniac so is up and down all night so their dog will get up with him. You are doing what you need to for your pup. You can try stretching out the time until you get up, even if it is just by 5 mins a day - you will know when Red is ready for this. Don't be upset by others comments, especially if they have no experience of what you are going through - there are plenty on here that have the same night time issues that you have, and there will be plenty more - it's a puppy thing, and puppyhood does not last forever. Remember the well used mantra on here - this too shall pass.
I don't think you're making a habit at all - I think you'd be making much more of a habit letting her go in her cage! Stanley didn't sleep through until he was about 17 weeks. And then he used to wake up early at like 5.30/6am. Over time it got later and later. He's now 11 months, today actually. This morning I got up at 6 to take OH to work. Opened the door to let Stanley out and he just looked at me. So I left him. I've since been for a run, dressed for work and went down again and he still looked fuming that he had to get up. With a big sigh he went trudging in the garden for his morning wee. You've got an early waking child and I've got a stroppy teenager
Thank you Boogie. I have just read in Pippa's puppy handbook that treats shouldn't be given after the evening meal. This poses a problem as I take Red for a last walk at 8.00 pm and I use minute bits of kibble to reward good walking (i.e. not pulling). We also start a training course next week starting at 7.30 in the evening and have been told to bring high quality treats. She is showing the beginning of seeing on command so that's good. Poo'd have been firming up,since as stopped given commercial treats as rewards and replaced with bits of kibble. My aim is to lengthen out the times at night. Thank you for the reassurance.
Thank you Samantha. Yes I keep seeing the mantra on here a lot and am slowly adopting it. My fragile confidence through lack of sleep and being physically challenged by a small pup (I have arthritis) just make my emotions all over the place. Have shocked myself at how low and upset owning a small pup have made me but excited to also have this dear little lab who daily becomes more loving. My husband is extremely supportive but can't be so hands on as he still works and he thinks I am trying to do too much. I just want a well trained happy dog.
I do understand how hard it is with a new pup - you want everything to be perfect but it just isn't....I never thought I would be sitting on a bench, in the pouring rain, crying my eyes out with fox poo in my hair but I did! Touch wood Bailey has not rolled in any fox poo for a few months so I am claiming that as progress . Tiredness is the absolute worst, although Bailey never woke up at night for a toilet break I was waking up worrying that he didn't need to go out! The change of our routine to include a pup, training him, house training him, worrying if he set off barking would it make the neighbours angry, getting unwanted and unnecessary advice from well meaning friends and even strangers on the street it all adds up. Keep going as you are doing a wonderful job and your DH sounds very supportive - did you ever take him up on his offer to puppy sit so you could have time to yourself?
