Argee with @JulieT, when I hear someone say "be nice" to their dog, I assume it's not nice on it's own and we don't stick around long to find out.
I leg it too and watch the dog like a hawk until I get out of range.had a shai pei gallop up to Rory snarling and growling and getting pushy owner not even near so I just said very loudly you can pack that in matey. Owner did not even call him in I just got in between him and Rory until he got bored. I got out of the way and he allowed it to harass and bully all the dogs it met. I watched it it was really stroppy
I think it's because they ignore the dog. I saw this today. I was training Betsy on a clear bit of field and two women with an older Labrador and a puppy - perhaps 3 or 4 months - walk through the clearing. Betsy starts playing with the puppy. Sigh. The two women completely ignore their dogs and keep walking. I spend a few minutes trying to get the puppies to disengage from each other, and the two women are completely involved in their conversation completely ignoring both me and the dogs! They disappear round the corner, and the little puppy legs it like mad to catch up! So...you know, if you really, really don't care about where your dog is, the dog probably knows you'll really drive home without him so makes sure that doesn't happen! Lesson in that somewhere....
I often hear owners say "play nice" or "don't be a bully" when their dog plays with Plum but I've just taken it at face value rather than an inference that the dog might be a bit of a demon! She tends to approach dogs in a submissive pose and is quite a titch so I think other owners are just trying to prevent their dogs being too boisterous with her. But really, she can hold her own despite the initial act of submission. I also tell Plum to play nice with a friend's dog who is much smaller than her and she can be a bit boisterous with him. But it's a completely pointless phrase coz she won't stop playing unless I put her on the lead. Which is probably the point!
Lol! It is a completely pointless phrase and I realised today that I think it is my mother's voice. She used to lecture us in the car on the way to their adult friend's homes "Say please and thank you, be nice and DON'T ask for food - you have eaten!" So basically I was a labrador as a child.
I have said "Be gentle" to Squidge when a smaller puppy as come bounding up and she's gone all Labrador on it, with the owner looking on obliviously. I don't expect her to pay a jot of notice to me, clearly, because she doesn't have a clue what I'm saying. But my running commentary ("Luna, you're much bigger than this puppy, you might hurt him, because you're so heavy and he's so little. You're really too big to play with him, you know. Shall we give him a bit of space now?") is my passive-aggressive way of saying "If she sits on his head and suffocates him, maybe you'll think twice about what dogs are appropriate for him to play with".
Why don't you just say to the human 'maybe you should call your puppy before he gets hurt!'. They might actually get what you are on about....
I go with the passive aggressive method too "it's ok Ella, they'll leave in a minute. Just keep with me and we'll get back to work/playing/our walk in a minute" as the owner slowly wanders up..
I get what your saying, we only use it when we are about to interact with a puppy, and we do follow it up with a P/A sentence. Dont actually know if it makes a difference to Vanilla, not 100% sure. She is however very gentle with the pup. When we do meet people and their dogs come hurdling towards us we tend to move on depending on people/dog. We meet people who have their dog off lead while Vanilla is on lead, and we get told their dog likes to tease dogs on lead. My quick reply back is 'that is nice how do they interact with off lead dogs' and I get Vanilla to sit and take the lead off. Amazingly the people have no response and their dog goes quiet and legs it (only has occured with 2 different dogs and has worked everytime). Then go back to our business. Other one is they just want to play, never sits with me as I take my cue from Vanilla and hers is get me out and lets move on now...
I put the "be nice" command that people say to their dogs who are approaching mine in the same category as the "be quiet" command that people yell to their dogs when they are barking. It's just to make the owner feel like they are really doing something to control their dog when in fact they aren't, and especially as a signal to the other owner (me) that they are in control of their dog. To me another owner saying "be nice" to their dog as I approach with mine means that I am now on high alert that their dog will be nasty in some way and avoid if possible.
Ah that is different then the way we use it. We use it when Vanilla sits and then a puppy comes up to say hello after their owners asked if it is OK. That is the only time we use it. We control the interaction with dogs as she thinks everybody wants to be her friend. She is learning that this is not the case and also we don't need to say hello to everybody. Does not help when everybody else wants to say hello and then takes offence when I say no we are training.
It sounds to me like Vanilla is very engaged with you on walks, and is aware of your body language and tone of voice. Bit like a gentle, but confident leader (Not like the walking stress bucket I can be!!! : If you are relaxed, making eye contact, and talking calmly to your dog I guess this translates as "It's OK...no problem here.... "
Oh dear. This is the sort of thread that makes me cringe with embarrassment. Because, of course, Pongo is That Dog. You know, the enthusiastic one with no recall who wants to say hello to everyone. And I'm That Owner, who has failed on the recall training and now spends a fair amount of time jogging after him and apologising. Which is why we normally avoid areas where we are likely to meet dogs whose owners we don't know; fortunately that is easy for us where we live. And I do use "be nice". For me it is not the words, it is the tone of voice, and Pongo does understand and respond to it (when he listens). It is the same tone of voice as I use when holding him as horses go past and I say "calm puppy, calm puppy", or "good lad, good lad" at the vet when she's looking in his ears. And yes, I also (confession time) say things that I know are pointless - including "come back here Pongo" - that I know will have no effect, but I say them only to show the other dog-owner that I am trying, that I appreciate that my dog is doing something that is spoiling their day, and that I'm sorry about it.... Also, if I hadn't found this forum I would have had no concept of what training is, or why some people might not want my dog to play. So, without this wonderful source of advice (and support), I would almost certainly be saying things like "don't worry, he is friendly" and not understanding that I might be interrupting a training session. So I do have sympathy with some of these other owners you are meeting. They might be me. Which is not to say that I think it is good or proper behaviour - quite the opposite, I am mortified by Pongo's behaviour because I can always hear the conversations on this forum about how irritating it is to others! I am just very grateful that I have found this place where I can get the sort of advice and encouragement that might (might!) help me and Pongo become more acceptable members of society... I feel like I ought to hand out leaflets to other dog owners with the web address and encourage them to join... So, that's my plea for the defense! I throw myself on the mercy of the court!
@Rosie I hear you! Stanley's the same and I'm always the owner saying sorry! Luckily, I've found most people like Stanley and don't mind him too much. You can't really mistake the full body wags and big smile as anything other than pure joy to meet everyone. I think that's why I talk to him too as kind of an apology to the owners. But most people laugh and say eee typical Labrador
@Rosie - yup! I hear you too. I go places where we're unlikely to meet other dogs..and if we do, I'm running up to get my dog, apologising. The problem with this, though, is progress (and we ARE progressing) is very, very slow.
I do engage with her a lot. I talk and tell her about my day (i know she has no idea what I am talking about, am sure othrr people thing I am mad). We do different things on our walks and train. I always look around to see who else is walking, as I know what her triggers are. Which is why we are holding off getting a second one until Vanilla is 2. But I can be a stress bucket if it gets way to busy. I then just remove us from the place.
I hear you as well @Rosie, non of us have perfect dogs and we all do our best, my 11 year old Lab was an embarrassment, he is really good now. I think it is the ones who do not even try to stop their dog being a pain that riles people. Though I think I am very patient when that happens as I understand
When Charlie nicks a football (as he does at least 4 times a year, down from about 12 times a year although I don't think he's nicked one since Christmas, so maybe we are still improving.....). I just say 'oh my, I am sorry, he's never done anything like that before....I can't imagine why he did that!' You should try it. Just look round at Pongo, look extremely surprised, give one recall and when he ignore it go get him (without saying anything). Then say (to the humans, not to your dog because speaking to your dog makes you look nuts, even though you seem to be in good company as this thread has shown ) : 'goodness, I don't know what's got into him, you wouldn't believe he's a triple obedience champion would you?' Give a short cheery laugh, shake your head (briefly) at your triple obedience champion and off you go....
