Potty Training Things were going well and even yesterday he sat in front of the door and waited to be taken out. We have been rewarding him with verbal praise and treats for going but didn’t do as much treats yesterday. Today we seem to have taken a step back on the potty training and he even did a wee in his bed (I’ll come back to issues with his bed) This wasn’t while he was sleeping - he was just having a wonder round and we didn’t read his cues so he did it where he was stood. Sometimes when he is taken outside it’s like he has no idea why he’s there. He just picks up pebbles and lays on the ground. Should I take this as a cue that he doesn’t need to go? There has been occasions when we have stayed outside with him for half an hour for him to do nothing then come inside and do it on the kitchen floor. He hasn’t had a poo accident in the house (with the exception of the first night). When he goes out in the night he’s quite good and does it reasonably quickly. 2. He hates his bed We got him a bed to put in his puppy pen rather than having a crate. He doesn’t seem the biggest fan of the bed and when he goes to bed on a night he chews it and wrestles with it. On Friday (through the day) we took the bed out of the pen and put it in the lounge where he seems more comfortable to spend his time and he weed in it - again I think we missed his cues. However my husband has now decided this must mean he dislikes it LOL. He wouldn’t sleep in it with the cushion in the bottom so we took that out and have it as a separate bed in the kitchen which he seems to enjoy sleeping on through the day. The bed was empty when he weed in it the first time but today he did it on his blanket that we had put in for a little bit of comfort. Should I remove the bed altogether or look for an alternative? I don’t want to cause anymore upset to my pup than he’s already had in his short time with us. 3. Puppy pen vs Crate We decided to use a pen rather than a crate. I don’t know if that was the best decision now. He won’t settle in the pen through the day. He eats his meals in there and I close the gate while he eats making sure I open it again before he finishes his meal. But if I have to contain him in there for any reason he whines and howls. I’ve tried ignoring him a little - I haven’t had a choice when I’ve needed to use the bathroom - and it doesn’t work. I’ve put various toys in there for him and he will go get them but not play with them in there. My husband has been here for the last week but from tomorrow I’ve got to get 2 kids ready for school (one of which is frightened of the land shark) and a puppy who brings the house down if he gets contained in his pen. I’m also expected to work from home so need him to have some spells of down time. I’m dreading leaving him to do school run and take my car for repairs later in the week as I don’t want him to howl and disturb the neighbours but also stress himself out. I know hindsight is a wonderful thing but should I change him to a crate or persevere with what I’ve started? 4. Daytime Daytime routine is almost non existent as he won’t be left in the pen without howling at the moon. He has his meals at regular times but he won’t sleep very much. Some days he only gets about 30 mins sleep between meals. This usually leads to his puppy biting being worse and he gets a serious case of the zoomies. When this strikes I usually take him into the main garden (separate to his toilet area) and let him run it off. He digs at the grass and rips it up in big chunks. He doesn’t seem to actually eat much though. Because he won’t use his pen through the day he sometimes wonders round like he can’t settle. Should I put him in the pen like I do on an evening and ignore him? I’m worried the lack of daytime routine will end up affecting the progress I feel we are making through the night. 5. Bedtime I have been sleeping on the sofa in our lounge since we brought the puppy home. His pen is in the utility which is the next room. We were ill advised that we should just put him to bed on the first night, ignore him and he wouldn’t cry forever. He went for about half an hour and when he woke my kids I decided I had to do something. When I got to him he had poo and weed in his pen. I’ve done some research and realise now we should have done things differently. I don’t know if this is the reason he’s so averse to it through the day. He goes to bed about 10ish after 1 final toilet break (I remove his water at 8pm) and for the last 2 nights I have had to sit where he can see me near the pen but with my back to him, I’m going to slowly move further away from the pen into the lounge until he can’t see me. It took him about 45 mins to settle the first time and then about 20 mins the second. He whimpers (a little) and messes about with his bed. He then hasn’t got up for his next toilet break until 3.45 and then 4.15 so he’s got some good control through the night - or at least that seems to be coming. How do I encourage him to settle himself. There’s only so much noise I can allow him to make. 6. Training I’m trying to do some training with him and have been following some you tube tutorials. He seems to know “sit” and we make him do that while he’s waiting for his meals. I’ve also tried to teach him “leave it” which he’s also getting good at. He’s very food motivated (like most labs) which means he’s good at the training however when the food runs out he starts with the puppy biting so we end up stopping so hopefully he’ll learn that way. Playing with him isn’t always a pleasant experience either because of the biting. He will be playing happily them all of a sudden he turns for your arm/hand/feet. We’ve started ending the games if he does this. Initially we were only doing this when he “mouthed” too hard but he started chasing and nipping at my feet. I cant risk him doing this to my children so we’re working on no biting at all. Is he too young to expect him to focus better? I hope this doesn’t sound like I’m moaning - I never thought this would be easy, I just didn’t think I would be as emotional as I am about it. He isn’t my first puppy but I don’t remember it being this difficult last time. I’m full of guilt as my youngest child is frightened of the puppy and it doesn’t feel like he's going to be the addition to our family we craved. My youngest has also asked if we can send him back to the breeder - twice. I’m suffering through lack of sleep so the rest of my house get some peace. My husband is more than willing to take turns but I worry this could cause confusion for the puppy? I’ve been looking through the various threads on this forum and never knew puppy blues were a thing. We’ve even had conversations about rehoming him which is awful I know! I’m feeling really down about the whole thing. Everyone says “he’s just a puppy” and “give him time”. I’m conscious that people will read this and think we haven’t given him chance. Maybe we haven’t, maybe there’s “worse” still to come. For context he is 9 weeks now and we collected him from the breeder at 8 weeks. On the 3rd day he was with us he was sick and then again the following day he also didn’t poo for 24hrs. I phoned our vet for advice and they asked to see him due to his age. The vet didn’t see anything wrong with him and put it down to the upset of coming home. She said he had to plain food for a couple of days before gradually reintroducing his kibble. So he’s been having boiled chicken 3 times a day mixed with gradually increasing amounts if his kibble. It’s taken a while for his bowel movements to settle. So all in all it’s been a tough week! At the moment i feel like I have bitten off more than I can chew but likewise I feel like I can’t give up on him. My family has been thrown upside down in a heartbeat! I know progress won’t always be 100mph and sometimes it will be harder than others but it’s generally taken the shine off what I had hoped would be a happy time. Sorry for the worlds longest post and I would be grateful for any insights/help/advice people can offer.
We brought our puppy home on Saturday and by last night I was pulling my hair out! Whining and barking for hours. I was advised to put her in a crate in the kitchen. When will she sleep all night? I also feel like I have taken on too much!
ive started sitting where our puppy can see me but I don’t look at him or give him any attention. He shuffles and grumbles but doesn’t howl and bark. My previous lab settled within a couple of weeks so I knew it wouldn’t be easy - but I don’t remember it being this hard either
I just wanted to offer some words of support as there are others who are much better placed to answer all your questions. I can say it does get easier, the first few weeks will always be the most intense. My wife and eldest did not bond with Lulu straight away, it took them a few couple months and now none of us can imagine life without her. She’s coming to 6 months next week. I’d be very surprised if you don’t raise a well socialised and adjusted dog as you seem incredibly diligent. I wouldn’t feel bad about the rehoming as I’m sure plenty of puppy owners have had those thoughts. Raising a puppy isn’t a linear process and you’ll have some great days, some bad days, setbacks but you’ll all get there together. I recall the first two to three weeks, I hardly saw my wife or the kids as I was with or training Lulu, watching her like a hawk and slowly introduced her to different elements, she had very limited interaction with the kids the first few weeks whilst she settled into her new surroundings. She is now brilliant with our 7 and 1 year old which took months of work and something we continue to work on. I’m not sure if this is possible or if you know anyone with older dogs, I managed for Lulu to spend quite a bit of time with two adult golden retrievers who helped a lot with her development, I would leave her with them for whole days once every week or two. Sincerely wishing you all the best.
Pen Vs Crate It does not have to be either/or. We used a crate in our bedroom at night, and a puppy pen in the kitchen during the day. We put a heavy cardboard box on its side in the pen so the pups would have a quieter place to sleep when they were in the pen. Until they were house trained, We only let them out of the pen when we could give them full attention. Initially they were confined to the kitchen unless we were watching very closely. Both of our pups were pretty well house trained by 14 weeks, and because we have a dog door, we could give them a little more freedom.
Thanks for responding, i worried that by having different sleeping arrangements through the day to what i want for him through the night might cause him some confusion but i guess consistency is key
At first toilet training takes a while because there's a lot of boring waiting around. But once the puppy starts to get the idea, they will toilet as soon as they get to the toilet place - because the location itself becomes a cue to toilet. Are you putting him on leash or puppy house line when you take him out? This is pretty important because then you can wait in a restricted area with him, and he will get bored of what there is to do there - and is more likely to think about toileting. If you let him roam freely around the garden, he might just continue to discover interesting things and forget to toilet - and then go when you come back indoors and he's in a boring place again... I wouldn't worry about him toileting in the bed, puppies just have to go where they have to go sometimes - but see below... No, you're reading way too much into puppy behaviour here. Puppies toilet on absorbent things. A bed or cushion is a great toilet place to them. It is also a great huge soft toy which they can wrestle and play with. If they feel like it, they might even sleep on it - or use it for all these things. He doesn't hate the bed, but soft beds are not a great choice for puppies. As you've experienced, they get toileted on because they are absorbent. They are then harder to clean than a blanket or vet bed, because they are bulky and don't fit in machines well. It is possible that the bed still smells like pee to him - or poo - from the times he's toileted on it. You'd have to wash it with bio laundry detergent to avoid that... If it smells at all like a toilet, he will only be encouraged to continue toileting on it... And as your pup grows up and gets his adult teeth, he is likely to start to chew on the soft bed. So really, for puppies, I would just use vet bed - inside the crate - see next point. If I wanted to make a sleeping place softer, I would just layer a few layers of vet bed or use some puppy blankets or fleeces or various types. Easily washable, at high temperatures... Get a crate and actually follow a crate training protocol. You don't avoid crate training or anything that a crate means by having a 'pen'. It's exactly the same thing to a puppy - it separates the puppy from you, just like a crate does. So it involves the same training, to use, as a crate does. That means following a step by step, progressive programme for training the puppy to like it. A pen isn't going to work as he grows bigger - he is simply going to jump out of it. If you want somewhere you can put your chewing adolescent labrador whilst you pop out of the house, without coming back to seeing the sofa has been eaten, then save yourselves money and time and crate train him. If you want to be able to go on holiday and leave a dog in a hotel room whilst you eat downstairs in the restaurant, crate train him. If you want him to be able to go to the vet and relax in a cage out the back without freaking out about the cage itself, crate train him. There are a bazillion reasons to crate train him. Follow a protocol like this one I wrote: https://thehappypuppysite.com/crate-training-a-puppy/ Note that you cannot put the dog in the crate and move away from it, until the dog knows how to repeatedly relax in the crate with you sitting (or sleeping) right next to it. That is key. The crate should not be associated with your absence, but with your presence. Are you taking him out of the house for at least 2 hours (from leaving the house till getting back) every day for a socialisation outing? If not, it's not surprising. He needs mental stimulation and at 9 weeks this should be coming through socialisation and new experiences in new places. He should be going to ride in a lift, on escalators, to skateboard parks, to visit livestock, to pubs, to cafes - everywhere. If you don't do this, the rest of your life and house will suffer... not to mention the lack of socialisation affecting the adult dog you are molding... Unless you want to sleep on the sofa for weeks (which some puppies do need), get a crate and put it by your bed. This might be a secondary, smaller crate, and not the same one you use in the day time location - unless you want to be moving crates about. I never understand why people are so averse to having puppies by their beds. The puppy needs to feel safe. They have been taken away from their mother and littermates and have never slept alone by themselves without anything warm/alive next to them. They need you to be at arm's reach, at least! Create a feeling of safety and security for your puppy and you create something to build on and progress from. Start out putting your puppy rooms away from you, create a feeling of panic and fear about being separated from you.... and you have nothing to build on at all and have only made negative associations with the place you want the puppy to relax. Yes. He's 9 weeks! It's fine to take turns. It won't confuse the puppy and you will get a good night's sleep every other night. You've only had him one week. Puppies are hard work, and they remain hard work with 'puppy stuff' sometimes until they are 6 months. (And after that comes adolescence, with a whole new range of challenges.) It's not going to radically change any time soon. The challenges will change, but they will be replaced with new challenges... To be already 'having conversations' about rehoming him is to be pretty far along, TBH - you will know if you could ever do that, or if your attachment to him is such already that you just couldn't... I say this because, if you ARE going to return him to the breeder (which would be the correct thing to do if you decided not to own him for longer), it is much better to do that now, when he is young and easy for the breeder to place in another home, than it is to keep him months and months longer...
While I agree that a pen doesn't work well for potty training because it is too big, I don't agree that they will necessarily jump out of it. Our last and current Lab, and the Samoyed we dog sit, completely respect a pen that is only 30" high. They don't push it and don't try to jump over it. We don't need a pen anymore, but still use it to block the front deck, and at the moment are using it to block off parts of the house during a remodel. We never did anything to force them to stay in or behind the pen, but they all just did. Cooper could clear it in an instant but she won't . I know that this Is not the case for all dogs, and I'm sure my Malamute would have ignored it completely but it works well for some dogs, and when it does it is really handy.
I can only offer some words of support since we are suffering from the same issues. We got our lab last Sunday 8 weeks old and we have exactly this problem. The first night he got an upset stomach and popped 10 times next day vet give him some medicine and ask to feed him plain food (chicken, rise) and he didn't poop for 24 hours. Now we are in transition period mixing rise, chicken and kibble. I can't get hang of his peeing he goes out to pee does his job come back in drink the water and 10 mins later pee inside his pen. On top of all that, we have a cat (we kept him since he was a kitten and he is like our child) and the cat is scared of him walking in the house like everything is made of paper even when the puppy is confined to his puppy pen and crate. I can say you are not alone I just want to do the same call the breeder and ask to return him. I feel really guilty about it, but I don't know how long I can take it. My daughter (11) also said yesterday that she is completely ignored when the puppy was bought because she loved it. Now I feel like she will never be able to take care of him. Sorry, I don't know if my words are supporting more depressing, but hopefully, your problems will be sorted. I joint the forum for the same reason today I want to talk to someone I want to vent it out.
