Hi, Molly is 3 months old today and I love her dearly. She has been very timid going for walks and I have struggled to get her walking. She hides from other dogs we meet. Today however I walked with my daughters friends mum and her lab and Molly was getting quite bouncy and excited, it was lovely. But anyway we started puppy classes last night, I was surprised how bouncy and friendly the other pups were, Molly sat under my chair for the most part. At the end the instructor said she thought Molly was quite anxious. I am worrying about this as I have an issue with anxiety and the first couple of weeks she was here I was super anxious. Could this have rubbed off on Molly or am I being paranoid?
Hi Cherry , I think you are trying to do your very best for Molly , so please don't worry too much . Like children , some pups are naturally gregarious , and some aren't , its just their individual natures . Some, like Molly, are more quiet and prefer a gentle approach to socialisation , as with the walk with your friend and her dog , some just cant handle the chaos which often comes with puppy classes . I do also believe that our moods can rub off onto our pups/dogs , so yes she will sense if you are over anxious but please don't beat yourself up over it , we just want to do our very best . I would leave the puppy classes out for now , its no use forcing an anxious situation onto her , keep with the walking with your friend if possible, until Molly has grown in confidence , build it slowly, she will be fine .
Hi sorry I can't help with puppy anxiety . But I do understand human anxiety. The first few weeks with pup where of course stressful and will result in increased anxiety. So much to think about , is pup ok ? Am I feeding him right? Have I done the right thing? Extra responsibility, never ending list of things that come with such a change in your life . And of course stress & anxiety leads to a spiral of over thinking xxx So please don't be so hard on yourself , you are doing just fine . The mind can be our own worst enemy . Hope this is a little bit helpful
There is definitely no way that you being anxious has made her become an anxious pup. It just sounds like she naturally has a bit of a cautious personality and needs to have time and gradual, non-threatening exposure to things in order to build her confidence. You didn't cause it but you can help her to learn to be comfortable in new situations. She is still just a little baby too. Some start out cautious and as they get older leave that behind and become outgoing. Just let her take her time in new situations, don't force things or people on her (I'm sure you're not), be generous with treats when things are a bit new and if she's worried about anything move away to give her space and to show her that she doesn't have to confront or be overwhelmed by scary stuff. If Molly was under the chair but curious rather than actually looking scared then it might be worth continuing with the class. If you could give Molly enough distance from the other pups so she could watch without her actually being fearful it might be good. Even if you spend the whole class sitting on a chair up one end of the room with Molly under the chair. Could you describe her behaviour a bit more? Was she straining to get away from the other pups and/or looking scared or was she sitting quietly and watching once she was under the chair? If the instructor is good they will help you to use the class to build Molly's confidence at a gentle pace, without expecting her to cope with or do too much.
At the class she was very cautious going in, so they straight away put us on the chairs by the door. She reluctantly came out from under the chair to do a couple of exercises with me but without any enthusiasm. She backed away when anyone approached her although was happy enough with the instructor once she started dishing out the treats! She wasn't happy with the others puppies approaching her either and again backed away and hid behind me. She actually went to sleep at one point as well! The other puppy parents were saying how calm she was, I did tell them she turns into a crazy bitey monster at home but I don't think they believed me
Jura was the same when she first started puppy class, and I used to get the comments about how calm she was too, especially from the other lab owners. All the other pups seemed so confident and bouncy in comparison to her. With her it really helped to let her sit at a distance she was comfortable with and take it all in and after 3 weeks she bounded in there excited to see the pups! Sometimes it just takes a wee bit longer when they have a cautious nature. Now she is a year old and has developed into a confident (sometimes over-confident!) teenager. Molly will get there it just takes time and patience to introduce her to new things slowly and calmly, and walking her with an older dog is a great idea.
Well, if the instructor is happy for you both to take it slow and have your own space (and the other owners are respectful of that) then it sounds like the class could be a good thing. I teach puppy classes at our local dog club and it's not that unusual to have the occasional pup who is a bit hesitant. Usually, given time and space, they become more and more comfortable. It is just important to let them tackle things at their own pace, to keep as a distance they can handle and not to make them have interactions they don't want to have. If she wants to hide behind you that is ok (and it's ok for you to ask other owners to please let her have space)
I agree with everyone, you haven't created an anxious pup. Molly is very young and naturally a bit wary of the very strange environment. It is important if she is exhibiting clear signals of anxiety, not to push the introductions at this stage, but give her plenty of space. Reward her if another dog barks in the class, or any strange noises, this will work well as a positive reinforcer especially as treats appear to override her cautiousness! Btw, Bramble at that age was very cautious, in fact her second walk outside was a disaster as a her nerves just took hold of her! Now she is very bold, not as gregarious as our other two, but certainly not nervous.
Thank you, I'm feeling better about things now. This site is great, it was advice on here that promoted me to approach my daughters friends mum and ask about walking with her and her lab. Hopefully we've both made new friends!
I think its also worth remembering that there is a very big difference between a cautious dog and a nervous one . Molly isn't nervous, she walks happily with your friends dog , she is just a baby and a cautious one . My lad is cautious, definitely not nervous, he is unfazed by gunshot , thunder, loud bangs of any kind, but he does like to take his time over new situations , it took him well over a year to venture into the water for a swim ,its not a bad thing at times
I agree with all the above, as we had a cautious pup and he never left my side for a long while. On walks he stuck next to me and was very sensitive to new situations. Very different to my last lab! At 6 months he is very different, much bolder and much more confident. I just took it slowly and let him get there on his own time and he certainly did that!! Walking with a friend and their lab helped us a lot at the beginning too so I would keep doing that if you can. Sam and bouncy Mole
