Letting go

Discussion in 'The Rainbow Bridge' started by Nicola77, Jun 9, 2016.

  1. Nicola77

    Nicola77 Registered Users

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    Hi all, I'm absolutely devastated and so is my partner as to weather we done the right thing. Are Charlie was 14 years old, a golden Labrador, he suffered with arthritis for the past 5 years I would say, for the past 6 months he has kept us up all night on a regular occurance, barking his head off until we came down stairs and slept with him, we have had numerous visits to the vets, were we have been sent home with some tablet or other, his back legs had been bad for a long time,but for the past 3 months he been wetting himself, if not lying in it, getting up and walking to door dribbling along the way, doing this numerous times a day, well we put Charlie to sleep on Monday and it absolutely broke us, my partner is devastated wandering if he done the right thing, he was with him when he passed, he is heartbroken, I feel like I've lost my right arm, the pain is unbearable, I never thought I would feel this way, do you think we done the right thing, or maybe could have held on to him for a while longer, thank you for listeningX
     
  2. Millieboo

    Millieboo Registered Users

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    I think you did the right thing, it hurts I know. Would you say that you would have a good life if you kept on wetting yourself? No.
    When it comes to animals it is hard to let go and usually people end up making their animals go too long without any good life standards. No words will comfort you since I know myself how hard it is to loose a animal (I hate when people say but it was just an animal stop cry about it). You had a good run with him and you had the decency to not let him go too long, without any suffers. I am so sorry that you lost him but you will always have the good (and the bad) memories.
     
  3. Hollysdad

    Hollysdad Supporting Member Forum Supporter

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    I really feel for you. We've been through this several times and its never an easy decision. There is always the feeling of guilt: did we do it too soon to a dog that might still have some life left, or too late and let our dog suffer unnecessarily? It was the right decision for the right reason. I hope that, in time, you'll recognise this for yourself and become reconciled to the decision you made.
     
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  4. Cath

    Cath Registered Users

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    You both love Charlie and you have done the right thing for him. He is free of pain. Yes, you will and do miss him, but one day you will look back and remember all the good times you had together. When I had my dog Robbie put to sleep in my arms, I thought I would never get over it, but I now look back and remember what a great dog I had and how lucky I was. Sending you hugs xx
     
  5. Oberon

    Oberon Supporting Member Forum Supporter

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    I would say you did the right thing and the kind thing. The right and kind thing is so often also the hardest thing...

    It's never the right thing to prolong their discomfort or suffering just so we can hold on for longer and postpone our grief.

    My first dog was 14 when we had to let him go. We always said that if he became incontinent then that would be the right time. In the end he got cancer and that made the decision for us, but if your dog had been my dog I would have done what you have done.

    Losing my dog was the worst thing that has ever happened to me so I understand how completely gutted and in pain you both feel.

    Be kind to yourselves. You did the right thing for your beloved dog.
     
  6. charlie

    charlie Registered Users

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    I am so sorry you had to make such a tough decision. I believe you made the right decision for Charlie, you were kind and loving until the end. I have never had to make this decision but I hope with all of my heart I would let my dogs go sooner rather than later to reduce any pain or discomfort. I would wish for them to be able to leave this world with dignity. Be kind to yourselves and soon you will remember Charlie and all the fun you had with him over his long lifetime. You are in my thoughts xxx
     
  7. Sammyboy

    Sammyboy Registered Users

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    It really is the hardest thing to do , we made the decision for our 13 yr old in October. The heartbreak and utter devastation was a massive shock . We knew that of course we would miss her and be sad that she was gone , but were unprepared for just how much pain we felt xx

    You absolutely did the right for your dog, no owner makes the decision lightly and I think it was the kindest decision . Xxx
     
  8. niclibrarylady

    niclibrarylady Registered Users

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    Sending you big hugs.
    Its a heartbreaking decision to make but i think it was the right one. Sometimes i think we want to hang on to our dogs because we can't let go.
     
  9. pedrolo

    pedrolo Registered Users

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    Dear Friend... you did well, as dog lovers, we are oblied to provide them the better live we can... and this include not to let them suffering when there is no way...

    Let me say one thing... when they are puppies or young, they give us everything, much more than we give to them, when they are old, we return to them just a part of what they gave us... and a part of this balance is not let your friend to suffer, and provide to them a honest and quiet end, being with them in their last journey.

    I cry many times when i remember Garbi (my little shnauzer)... but I know I did well, like you did.

    Best hugs.

    Pedrolo.
     
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  10. edzbird

    edzbird Registered Users

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    It truly is the hardest thing we do for our beloved dogs, and it is the last great thing we do for them. You know inside you have done the right thing for your good friend, but you will be raw with grief..let it pass in your own time and gradually your pain will be overtaken with lovely memories of Charlie. I am very sorry for your loss.
     
  11. Stacia

    Stacia Registered Users

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    You did the right thing, but it is so painful to bear the loss of a beloeved pet and we all wonder if we did make the right decision. I used to work for a vet and remember one client who would not have her dog euthanised, the dog was a mass of raw tumours and suffering, she was being selfish. I am sure you loved Charlie above yourseves, it is the most loving thing we can do for our dogs, to ease their pain. We miss them dreadfully but it is true that time eases the loss and we remember them knowing that we did not let them suffer.
     
  12. bbrown

    bbrown Moderator Forum Supporter

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    You did the last, hardest but most important thing we ever do for the animals we're privileged to care for. My deepest sympathies.
     
  13. Karen

    Karen Registered Users

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    Nicola, those of us who have had to say goodbye to a dearly beloved dog understand how you are feeling. You did the right thing, and in time you will realize that. You will never forget Charlie, he will be in your heart and thoughts forever.

    I'm sorry this was the reason that brought you to the forum, but welcome anyway. If there are any stories or photos of Charlie you would like to share with us, we would love to see them.
     
  14. Boogie

    Boogie Supporting Member Forum Supporter

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    Welcome to you and RIP Charlie.

    You did the right thing and he knew nothing about it except that he fell asleep with his loved one close by.

    I still weep when I remember the last hours with my beloved Gavin, but it does get easier with time xx

    ...
     
  15. BevE

    BevE Registered Users

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    Oh Nicola, I am so sorry for your loss. Our animals depend on us to make the hardest of decisions for them. You absolutely did the right thing for your much loved dog. We lost our Cooper, a 13 year old golden lab, 18 months ago and I thought the pain would break me. I still have teary days but can now remember the wonderful life we shared with him and how much joy he gave us. I swore I would never have another, but 5 weeks ago we welcomed Bailey, a beautiful chocolate lab puppy. In the short time we have had him he has given us so much and I know we have many exciting years ahead. Someone said to me that to end our beloved dogs suffering we must suffer and I think that's right. It is our final thank you for the joy they bring to our lives.
     
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  16. Snowshoe

    Snowshoe Registered Users

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    I'm so sorry for your loss. It's such a hard decision to make. Charlie was 14 and you are so lucky to have had him all that time.

    One thing I learned was to see how the pet acted when not with me as opposed to with me. They tend to rally in our presence and can seem better than they really are. Then when they are away from us, when we are at work maybe, they might even be with different people but are better with us; how are they alone or with those different people? But the pet does not seem as bad with the loved owner so it can be very hard for the person closest and most loved by the pet to tell how they are sometimes.
     
  17. Lisa

    Lisa Registered Users

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    So sorry for your loss, it is so very hard. You did the kind and loving thing, please don't beat yourself up over it. It's all so raw for you right now, but it is true that time is the great healer. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve, but don't feel guilty.
     
  18. drjs@5

    drjs@5 Registered Users

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    I am so sorry you are suffering.
    Something I learned on this forum....
    Better a day too early than a day too late.

    You did your very best. I agree don't beat yourselves up. You know you did the right thing, or will when you can look at this without such raw emotions as you do just now.

    Wishing Charlie zoomies over the bridge with all the other beloved fur babies x
     
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  19. Granca

    Granca Registered Users

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    It's such a hard decision, but the best one we can take when our pets are suffering. You had fourteen happy years with Charlie and eventually you'll remember those happier times. Meanwhile try to be reassured that you did the right thing and Charlie was so lucky to have a kind and loving family.
     
  20. SwampDonkey

    SwampDonkey Registered Users

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    You were kind and compassionate he knew he was loved and that you would help him. We all understand and send love x
     
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