Juno

Discussion in 'The Rainbow Bridge' started by Annie, Aug 1, 2017.

  1. Annie

    Annie Registered Users

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    Really struggling to come to terms with the unexpected loss of our little girl Juno. She passed away unexpectedly a couple of days following an operation whilst still recovering at the vets. She was only 3 years old.
    I am completely heartbroken, devastated and filled with guilt for not being there for her. I know it's only been a couple of days so emotion is still very raw but it just feels like it is impossible to accept and come to terms with.
    We got Juno as an 8 week old pup. My husband works away a lot so she was my companion. She was always my constant and our dog walks really helped me get through some lonely times.
    She was a fantastic dog, not a bad bone in her body. She never growled or snapped at another dog even if they were grumpy back at her. She never got jealous she just wanted to play and be friends.
    Juno was so sensitive to our moods she only ever wanted to please. She was amazing around our 6 month old daughter (apart from occasional face lick and waggy tail in the face!). We were just beginning to see a beautiful relationship develop between them and I'm gutted my daughter won't experience this.
    I'm racked with guilt and regret of all the things I wish we could of done and said to her if we had known this was going to happen. I don't know what to do with my day now as our dog walks were such a big part of our daily routine. I tried going for a walk yesterday as I hate being sat in the house all day but it was horrible because everywhere just reminds me of where we used to walk Juno.
    How have others come to terms with their loss? Did anything in particular help or is it just time? I feel I can't talk to many people about this as they don't understand and probably think I'm over reacting over a dog... but she meant so much more to us than that. She will always be an important member of our family. I wish we had more time with her.
    Thanks for reading my ramblings. X
     
  2. Oberon

    Oberon Supporting Member Forum Supporter

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    I'm so incredibly sorry. What a dreadful thing to have happened.

    Having lost a beloved dog I can say that time does make it better, though you'll think of Juno often and years later some of those thoughts will still bring tears. It's hell right now but in time you will come out of this awful, shocked phase.

    I think that no matter at what age you lose a dog or however it happens it's normal to feel all the things you're feeling. Including feeling guilty, which is not logical or fair on yourself but it's something we seem to put ourselves through.

    We all understand here. We really do. You have lost a hugely beloved member of your family. Big hugs.
     
  3. SwampDonkey

    SwampDonkey Registered Users

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    So sorry. The only things thst have helped recover have been time and thinking about the fun happy times with my dog. My dogs were also a huge part in my life I don't think we understand their true contributions until they are gone. Love and hugs from us all here.Juno sounds like she was a sweet dog
     
  4. Lisa

    Lisa Registered Users

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    So sorry for your loss. I have been there. It will get better as time passes and you will enjoy your happy memories of Juno, but it does take time. Please don't feel guilty, you loved her and gave her a great life.
     
  5. Atemas

    Atemas Registered Users

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    I am so very sorry you have lost your lovely Juno. Don't feel guilty. She had a good life with you.
     
  6. Annie

    Annie Registered Users

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    Thank you for your messages of support it really does provide some comfort in the knowledge that others understand and have also felt similar feelings when their dogs have passed. I'll be reminding myself it is normal to feel like this.
    SwampDonkey you are so right when you say we don't truly appreciate what our dogs bring to our lives until they are not there. She was so embedded in our lives.
    Just lying in bed now feeling exhausted after another rubbish nights sleep contemplating what to do for the rest of the day. Is it best to carry on doing things you would usually do even though it feels really hard and lack all motivation? I don't want to ignore my feelings and act like I'm trying to forget her. I would normally go to a mother & baby group this morning... I should probably go just for my daughters sake at least. Trying really hard not to let her see me cry all the time. Brave face today.
     
  7. Atemas

    Atemas Registered Users

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    Yes you should go. Try to focus on your daughter. Keep busy.
     
  8. edzbird

    edzbird Registered Users

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    So sorry for your very sudden, sad loss. I Don't think there is anything you can do to come to terms with it - just time will ease your pain. Gradually, the hole Juno has left will fill with happy memories xx
     
  9. Peartree

    Peartree Registered Users

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    Oh gosh I totally understand how you feel having been there myself four years ago. I was so shocked at how distraught I was when my young dog was killed in an accident and I think I was a bit unhinged for a few days.

    Be kind to yourself, if you loved your dog, and it sounds as if you did, then you will need to mourn her properly. People who haven't had dogs just don't understand how much you miss their physical presence.

    You will feel better, but it takes time. Little things trip you up and you will get waves of grief, but gradually it gets less and more manageable. I have lost dogs to old age but losing a young dog is quite different.

    Much love (having a little weep here)
     
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  10. Oberon

    Oberon Supporting Member Forum Supporter

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    I think it's good to start to force yourself to get out and do stuff at some point. You won't want to be there and you'll still feel like you've been run over by a bus but that's ok and normal. If you end up having a bawl at the same time that's ok too.
     
  11. Beanwood

    Beanwood Registered Users

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    Oh I am so heartbroken for you. Be kind to yourself, of course you feel a bit lost at sea, it has been a terrible shock.
    I don't really have anything to add...but just wanted to say I am thinking of you x
     
  12. snowbunny

    snowbunny Registered Users

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    In times of grief, these wonderful words often help me. Written by an elderly man on reddit, "GSnow", I think it is just beautiful, and just as applicable to losing one of our dogs as it is to a person.

    Alright, here goes. I'm old. What that means is that I've survived (so far) and a lot of people I've known and loved did not. I've lost friends, best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, grandparents, mom, relatives, teachers, mentors, students, neighbors, and a host of other folks. I have no children, and I can't imagine the pain it must be to lose a child. But here's my two cents.
    I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don't want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don't want it to "not matter". I don't want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and live deeply and be cut, or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can't see.
    As for grief, you'll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you're drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it's some physical thing. Maybe it's a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it's a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.
    In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don't even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you'll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what's going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything...and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.
    Somewhere down the line, and it's different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O'Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you'll come out.
    Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don't really want them to. But you learn that you'll survive them. And other waves will come. And you'll survive them too. If you're lucky, you'll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks.
     
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  13. Joy

    Joy Registered Users

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    I'm so sorry. It's heartbreaking to lose a dog at any age, but so much harder when it's unexpected. Time does eventually help you to remember your dog without such sadness.
     
  14. Cath

    Cath Registered Users

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    So sorry for your loss of your dear friend. In time you will be able to smile again and she will always be with you in your heart.
     
  15. Stacia

    Stacia Registered Users

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    Deeply sorry to read of your loss of your beloved dog in such sad circumstances. I have been there, walking down our lane, calling out for my dog who was dead, I knew she wasn't there, but I just had to call her name. Walking without her had no meaning. The world was bleak. But, time does heal and I now have had several dogs over the years and can think of Gemma without pain. Try to go out as much as you can, it does help and know that we on the forum understand you pain as many of us will have experienced the same and we are metaphorically holding your hand. x
     
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  16. snowbunny

    snowbunny Registered Users

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    :( Heartbreaking
     
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  17. kateincornwall

    kateincornwall Registered Users

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    I am so very sorry to hear of your loss , how devastating for you all . As someone who has worked for the Blue Cross pet Bereavement Support Service , I would encourage you to talk about your lovely Juno , even writing about her can help so much . When you feel able , maybe make a memory box , plant a rose or shrub in her memory . These early days are so hard , and our loss never ever fades , we just learn to live with it eventually . Am wishing you the strength to cope , and send hugs xx
     
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  18. BevE

    BevE Registered Users

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    Oh I am so sorry. Be kind to yourself and know that it is ok to grieve Junos loss. She wasn't "just a dog" Hugs xx
     
  19. bbrown

    bbrown Moderator Forum Supporter

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    I'm so very sorry to read your sad news. You're in my thoughts xxx
     
  20. Granca

    Granca Registered Users

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    I'm so sorry to hear the sad news about Juno. You're not over-reacting at all; dogs are so much part of the family, not 'just a dog'. Do try to keep busy for your daughter's sake, though, and try to talk about all the good memories of Juno. It will take time.
     

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