Our puppy is 4.5 months old and could care less about us. We have given her so much love and attention but she just wants to sit alone in the kitchen. Not interested in sitting on the bed or couch with us or much of anything. It's very frustrating because I feel like all I do is attend to her needs (and she is still up during the night so we are exhausted) and yet there is no return of affection. Will she outgrow this or is this her personality? The most excited she gets is for my neighbor's dog and she's crazy about him. She is from an excellent breeder.
Only time will tell, but I really don't think you need to worry. I had very similar feelings to you for both the dogs I raised from puppyhood and both ended up being very affectionate, albeit in different ways. I've told this story here on the Forum before, but with my first boy, I actually called the breeder and pretty much cried to her about how Duncan didn't even care about me. He and I were together nearly 24/7 (he came to work with me) and yet he couldn't even be bothered to look up at me when I came in the room, let alone follow me from room to room. She told me, "Well of course he doesn't get excited to see you - YOU'RE ALWAYS THERE!" So to apply this to you, maybe you've done such a good job at helping your girl feel secure and confident that she doesn't feel like she needs to be constantly checking in with you? By the way, that puppy of mine (Duncan) turned into the world's best cuddler, but he never could be bothered to even raise his head when I came home. I'd always just find him snuggled in bed, not moving a muscle, waiting for me to come to HIM for a cuddle. My second dog, Brogan, actively resisted being held or cuddled as a puppy and definitely preferred the company of my other dog to me. He was a longer hold out and never did become a dog that liked to snuggle on the couch or bed together (I think he got too hot) but he showed me he loved me in other ways and became the most people-focused dog imaginable. It took time, though - I'd say he was about two years old before humans became as interesting as other dogs. The best thing in the world for building the bond is positive training. It doesn't matter what you train, but consistently doing 3-4 ten minute long sessions a day with your dog really does the trick. Working towards a goal to keep you motivated - like the Canine Good Citizen test or UK equivalent - is especially helpful. Hang in there!
Benson at that age was also a bit a bit indifferent to me. Granted he got excited and enjoyed all our short training sessions, but all my efforts to be the main focus in his life fell largely on deaf, albeit gorgeous chocolate, velvet ears! But hey, what did I expect? He was just a puppy, and therefore a baby. Exploring his environment, with all those fascinating smells, meeting exciting new people, dogs and well...things were always going to be far more interesting than my lame attempts! Roll on 4 years and he is a perfect companion. Very much my dog out of the current 4 labs we have. He never going to be a cuddly boy, but I question whether we should expect this of our dogs?
This was me for the first year or so with Stanley. He was a cuddly pup but then he got to about 6 months and wasn't anymore. Now I think he's just accepted his fate and let's me shower him with cuddles and kisses while giving me the here she goes again face
I like the above post. But I make my choccie give me a kiss, and I meant a serious kiss, not just a quick lick to get down. Of course, I treat him continuously to cuddle and snuggle and kiss. He get food reinforcement for these behaviors.
Aww I feel my Coco really does like me, he follows me, he pushes against me, and I feel his affection but he is not cuddly with me - probably because I am not cuddly with him. OH will get down & snuggle & rough house with him on the floor & Coco responds, but he is far more attached to me - I walk him, talk to him, train him, and I feel like we are a unit. Keep up with the training @Flarma and you bond will grow in it's own special way.
I think it will come. My puppy Red was a bit like yours and at that age I felt I was just attending to her needs - it was hard. By 6 months the affection was coming and now at almost 15 months, she is the most loving, cuddly, affectionate, playful dog who follows us around.
Thank you! I am hopeful she will get more affectionate as she gets older and I will be writing to help someone else in a few years!
