Struggling with our new puppy

Discussion in 'Labrador Puppies' started by LoraFlora, Mar 5, 2019.

  1. LoraFlora

    LoraFlora Registered Users

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    Hi all,

    Apologies if there's already a similar post on here, I'm just so desperate for advice. We recently brought an 8 week old Labrador puppy. I've lived with Labradors all my life and really wanted my daugjter (16 months) to have that experience. I was so excited to finally be getting my own. I did all the research, thought I knew exactly what I was getting into. Now I think I might be losing my mind.

    I am running on two/three hours sleep if that. If we put her on the floor on her bed in our room she just runs around and plays, which is very loud on a hardwood floor. If we put her on our bed she wiggles around all over the place and then settles on my legs, so I can't move for the rest of the night. She wakes me up at five to go out, and she does go outside like she's supposed to sometimes. But then she'll wait until we've got back upstairs and go again, or just won't settle back to sleep and wants to play.

    She's also started completely ignoring me when I call her, or correct her for doing something I don't want her to. So now I'm terrified she's decided I'm not the boss and she doesn't have to listen to me. Because of the lack of sleep I find myself really short tempered, and have to really try not to lose my temper with her or my daughter. I've considered crating her during the night (she has an extra large crate in our living room) but worry about her crying and waking my daughter.

    My husband and I have had some pretty big rows since getting her. He's more or less abdicated responsibility for her to me because I'm the one who wanted a puppy. I feel like such a terrible person for saying this, but I sometimes wonder if I've done the right thing or if I should have waited until my daughter was older. I desperately don't want to be a failed puppy owner, this was not a decision I rushed into by any means, we've been discussing it for years. But I feel like I'm not coping at all and am completely lost for what to do for the best.
     
  2. ayres

    ayres Registered Users

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    Hi Lora Flora.
    Having a Lab Puppy is very hard work and so many people really struggle especially when you have other responsibilities on top of the puppy, But it does get better quickly (my Alfie has just turned a year and he's doing so well now).
    Whose the boss kind of not really relevant any more, The puppy will do what rewards it. so if it smelling something is more rewarding to it than coming when you call it will continue to smell or do whatever else its doing. I highly recommend having a read of total recall its done wonders for me on all my training the theory at the beginning is really useful.
    As for the sleep issue have you considered crate training? (think of it as a little den for your pup) it will be a hard couple of nights until the pup is used to it but in long run you and the pup will be happier (Alfie now goes in his crate for naps whenever he feels like it.

    Have a read of
    labrador-puppy-training

    Chin up, hang in there and it does get better quickly.
    Craig
     
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  3. Michael A Brooks

    Michael A Brooks Registered Users

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    Totally agree with @aryes suggestion of crate training. Iit will save you considerable stress.

    It will get better. Puppy training is hard. But it will get better.and certainly will if you crate train. Please read the following

    https://thehappypuppysite.com/crate-training-a-puppy/
     
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  4. TEE

    TEE Registered Users

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    having had our puppy for just under 2 weeks, I can only state too as above that it is down to the crate to keep us sane. Can't imagine layering a 16 month on top. With the crate you should be clear in the night. that will get you sleep. during the day use crate or play pen to give puppy more downtime without having to always watch her when a sleep.
     
  5. Edp

    Edp Registered Users

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    Having a lab puppy is similar to having another baby, except they grow up faster. They are full on hard work but eventually they are the delightful family member you dream of. This phase you are in is tough as sleep deprivation is to be expected and it’s not easy. Having a toddler and a pup is difficult too, it’s a balance of priorities but achievable if you work at it. It’s probably worth sacrificing a couple of rough sleeps for your daughter and crate train your pup. It will get better..just hang in there :)
     
  6. Andrea0408

    Andrea0408 Registered Users

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    If it helps, I crated Hunter from the night we got him. The first night was horrific, he howled and whinged all night and my 6 year old daughter came into my room around 2am and asked me to take him back. I can laugh now but that night was awful.
    And things got better from there, he cried less and less every night and within a week it was only for about 10 minutes. He needed 2 toilet trips at first, then 1 and for the past 2 or 3 weeks goes 11-7 without a noise.

    He's 16 weeks now and I can't remember the last time he made any noise about his crate, he will go into it himself when he wants and I use it a lot when I have stuff I need to do, and when we are out. Life is a lot easier.

    I'm a single working parent, although my daughter is 6 so a bit easier and there have definitely been times where I've wondered if I did the right thing but it seems to get easier all the time and I couldn't imagine not having him here.
     
  7. Ski-Patroller

    Ski-Patroller Cooper, Terminally Cute

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    We crated Tilly and Cooper as soon as we got them. They were crated at night, and in puppy pen in kitchen during the day. We let them out when we could supervise them, and put them back in when we could not. By 12 or 14 weeks they were pretty reliably house trained, though they chewed on things they shouldn't. We still have a pet gate at the kitchen door so we can keep them in or out of the kitchen, if we need to. At our home we have a dog door to the back yard so they could go out when they needed, once they had the run of the house. At our cabin, we have to take them out, but they seemed to get that almost immediately.
     
  8. Jo Laurens

    Jo Laurens Registered Users

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    Crate her. Right by your bed. If she cries, lay your hand on her through the bars - don't move it or stroke her much or get her excited, she just needs to know someone is there.

    Follow the crate training guidelines Michael has posted above (which I wrote, so of course they are super amazing :nod: )

    You should not be 'correcting' a puppy for doing ANYTHING AT ALL. If you find yourself doing this, it means you don't know enough about dog training to be raising a puppy well and you really need professional help from a reputable and force-free trainer.

    Lastly, puppies are HARD WORK. You need to be really UP for it. And all members of the family need to be on board. If you don't think that's the case, then rather than struggle on for weeks with things deteriorating, return the puppy to the breeder and get a full refund whilst you can.
     
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