We got Baylee when she was 8 weeks old, she is now 11 months old. I have noticed that she isn’t affectionate towards anybody. We also have a 5 yr old German Shepherd that is the opposite of her. She gives us kisses and thinks she’s a lap dog.... all 95 pounds of her. Baylee won’t even lick our hand or anything. So what has happened is that it’s caused me to not be able to get close to her. I don’t feel a connection with her at all. My husband loves her but I can’t say I do? I’m sorry I know it sounds weird and horrible but I just can’t get close to her. I am definitely closer to our GSD and love her to the moon and back. I see her as mine but with Baylee, it’s like she’s someone else’s pup. I don’t know what to do.
A few things sprung to my mind. 1) Do you have “puppy blues”? Pippa wrote about this on the Labrador Site (if I understand well, the gist is that you’re knackered by your puppy and think they hate you). I definitely had days where I wondered if our dog hated me when we first bought him home (the whining and crying especially)... but now he could not be more loved if we tried. 2) Play time. Do you play with Baylee? My husband thought our dog preferred me when we first bought him home but in reality, I just played with the dog more - and consequently I had a stronger bond. Now, hubs and the dog are best buds - because they play together. 3) Expectations. I constantly remind myself how old our puppy is and check my expectations. You can’t expect Baylee to act like an adult GSD yet because she’s still a baby. Comparing them is unfair on both dogs.
Dogs are like people - not everyone has the same “love language” or interest in physical affection. That can be hard when that’s how you’re used to connecting with a dog. What types of activities do you do with your pup? I’d consider trying out something like a nosework or rally-o class to help build some teamwork and connection. Make time for short daily training and husbandry sessions just the two of you as well. Develop more of a partnership with her and really build communication. And look for other ways your dog might be showing affection without contact, like gazing at you or checking in for approval, bringing you toys or other play things, sitting/laying near you, showing joy when you come home, etc.
