Hi everyone - just been reading some threads and feel so relieved to know that I'm not the only one who can find first time puppy ownership hard work. My boyfriend got home earlier and I burst into tears as today has been really hard. Totally not Seren's fault but I just felt like a real failure as I was getting frustrated but as I'm sleep deprived I just found it so hard to be upbeat and patient and then got all stressed that I was damaging mine and Seren's relationship, or that he would start to doubt me... God! I knew it would be intense but i didn't realise I'd be sitting on my meditation cushion at 11am taking deep breaths so I could be calm and consistent for the little chap and not lose my rag... I think generally our first week has gone well? No toilet accidents inside yet, getting up once in the night, bonding a bit more each day, not much biting YET! But, his whining seems to be getting worse although I've never responded to it. And I ignore night whining even when it breaks my heart. He always falls asleep but it seems like an eternity. So today he was just going nuts and wouldn't settle. We've been cuddling a bit more over the last couple of days which has been great for bonding/grooming, but now he gets whiney and jumps up at the pen if i leave the room... tried different toys/congs/C&T training session/outside games/indoor games/me just sitting in the pen deep breathing and trying to emanate calm?! But when in crate he was just ripping up his bed, chewing the bars, digging as if trying to get out, whining etc etc. And just worked himself into a frenzy. I never shut the crate if hyper, only when calm, but it doesn't last. He's been fine in his crate til today. I've been doing Pippa's advice of going in and out and rewarding when silent, building up slowly but surely. I so hope this gets better? I just want him to be OK, he is SUCH a little cutie, but right now when he's tearing up his crate I can't tell whether he's being a cheeky puppy or genuinely getting anxious... If this is all normal then thank god, but I just so don't want to give separation anxiety OR get him too needy... where's the balance?! Am I overthinking this? Another point is that when going to get his first jabs a few days ago I mentioned to the vet that he seemed really bothered by his rear area - bum, hind legs, paws and lower back. She said he didn't have signs of pests but today when he was asleep on me I scoured his body and found a flea. So phoned vet and he said he could be allerigc to fleas which could be making him go even more mental... Blimey. I AM KNACKERED!
Re: Is this normal?! Mmm...well, having a new puppy can be a bit stressful, but you maybe need to relax a bit. . Get some more sleep? He whines if you leave the room - just ignore that, it'll wear off. He doesn't settle in his crate - have you been through crate training? Go back a few steps if you need to. And you found a flea - flea treatment required. Everything else seems to be going well, so lots to be happy about.
Re: Is this normal?! Deep Breathing is good Sally....and yes it does sound like pretty normal puppy stuff. Right now, you are Seren's WHOLE world. You are in charge of seeing to his every need - safety, food, entertainment, and skill building. Keep working on training and some alone time. When my Bella was brand new, for her own safety, when I went out to do my farm chores - she would be put in a kennel and I would go outside. Whining, barking, howling, frantic scratching all happened. I need to be outside for 10ish minutes at a time, and I knew she was safe - albeit unhappy. I did a few clicker sessions with her for being quiet and settled....in the cage be quiet, out of the cage was the reward....but ultimately from the first day she HAD to be in there if I went outside and she threw a fit...but I absolutely do not EVER let her out of her kennel until she is quiet and still. In the beginning it didn't last long (the being quiet thing) but I never open the door and let her out if she is making any sound. She is better about it now, and doesn't put up quite the same level of a fit....and does some quiet time with me in the room, and lots of kennel time during the day at work with hubby...but at home she prefers NOT to be in the kennel. It will get better...and then you'll find new issues to post about! ;D ;D ;D
Re: Is this normal?! Hi Sally We've all been there/ are there , I knew having a puppy would be hard work but didn't realise the extent of it. Sounds like you're doing a fab job, no accidents indoors!!!!! WOW, I've cleaned 3 poos and a few wees up today .... Bella is 14 weeks, has a dicky tummy but toilet training goes up and down . Bella used to whine bark etc even when I went to the loo, but it will pass, she's much better now, but still barks if shut in the kitchen behind a baby gate at times, now she knows I ignore this behaviour she soon gives up, keep at it!! When I leave for work some mornings she does it, pulls on my heart strings!! But she has her Kongs. Puppy sitter said she also does it sometimes when she leaves but soon calms down. All the things you have described are perfectly normal, I've learnt!!! They are still babies after all. I was sleep deprived for days and it defo makes you more emotional but it does get better ;D Just make sure you keep going out- build it up slowly eg stand outside front door for 2,5 10 minutes and so on, he'll learn you're coming back . Bella hated being shut in her crate so when I go out I leave her in the kitchen with crate open and penned off so it's safe. Last few days I've even trusted her in the living room for a quick dash to the shop. She never barks then!!!
Re: Is this normal?! The first couple of weeks of puppy ownership is stressful! My friends now tell me they found all my frenzied messages during that time hilarious as I spent every day finding something new to get paranoid about and panicking. I can laugh about it now 4 months down the line and having realised that puppies are resilient little things but it was definitely hard work at the time. Don't worry too much about your relationship with Seren, by the sounds of things you will be a great puppy parent. I had days where I wondered the same things but as long as you are feeding them and looking after them puppies will forgive most things. Keep trying to be calm and consistent and if it gets hard just step away and have half an hour to yourself again. It's not easy when they are whining but as Julie says that will fade and young puppies sleep a lot so take advantage of it. Don't beat yourself up if things go wrong, that will always happen and real life is never perfect. The first 2 weeks with Inca were definitely the hardest for us but once we got paste that point each week became easier. You won't be exhausted for ever
Re: Is this normal?! Everyone else has offered good advice… I just wanted to share some photos of my puppy when I first started crate training her, maybe this sight looks familiar to you? And this is her yesterday when I opened her crate for her and told her she could come out after a nap: It gets better!
Re: Is this normal?! It was really tiring when I first brought Chepi home. I ended up sleeping when she did sometimes to get a rest. It's a lot to do on your own; I would try to get a break over the weekend while your boyfriend is there.
Re: Is this normal?! Hi - all completely normal!!! I have been through most of this too and certainly had tears and even thoughts that we had made a mistake in getting a puppy!! However it does get easier (slowely) and you will get new things to worry about!!! Phoebe is 17 weeks and the last few weeks have definitely been easier in lots of ways. Keep going with leaving the room - you just have to ignore the whines (put some music on!!!) and keep persevering with the crate. Phoebe loves her crate now and often doesn't want to come out when we open the door. The toilet training will become a distant memory and probably replaced with biting issues!!! Keep going you are doing brilliantly!!! X
Re: Is this normal?! Sally Yes it is normal!!. Amber is now 16 weeks old and it seems amazing that it is only 8 weeks ago that she turned our life upside down. You need to get some sleep and try and relax. You have done a lot of research and preparation but remember Seren hasn't read the books. You need to work through it together your way using all the advice but trusting your instincts. You sound to be doing a brilliant job.
Re: Is this normal?! [quote author=Jo Parker link=topic=9727.msg140664#msg140664 date=1422690981] Keep going with leaving the room - you just have to ignore the whines (put some music on!!!) X [/quote] I agree. A bit of whining does them no harm at all. They are safe, well, fed and loved. They will soon learn to be alone for short spells. Not leaving them alone can cause problems in the long run. Sit it out!
Re: Is this normal?! I had a German Shorthaired Pointer who yelled all night long for the first three nights (her brother, who I didn't have, yelled for over a week every night, in desperation the owners gave him some red wine and he relaxed ), she ran rings round me, pulled on the lead and was a total nightmare. I confess do disliking her but eventually all changed and she was the most wonderful dog and we loved each other deeply. So hang in there, it really does get better, that's a promise.
Re: Is this normal?! Gosh thanks everybody, it is so great to know that I'm not making anything worse and that everybody has gone through similar experiences! It is such a relief that to know it's ok to leave him whining for a bit in the day and that he'll get over it in time... Woke up this morning feeling a bit silly that I'd had ended up in tears yesterday and then posted it on the internet : ... but those photos made me laugh so hard when I saw them, that is EXACTLY what Seren is like right now. And it's true, I've read the books but sometimes I get a bit unsure if things don't go to plan... but it's nice to hear that you all went through it and worked it out with time and patience, training etc, and that you have happy puppies. A lot of the people round here in our farming community are pretty old school when it comes to puppy training, so it's encouraging to hear all of your challenges and successes involved in positive training! I've been doing click for quiet a lot and am up to 20 second gaps now, so hopefully that'll help... and will continue with making his crate a great place to be... Also the flea treatment has calmed him down a lot which is good. I knew there was a problem! My boyfriend reiterated your comments last night, saying that nothing is perfect and I need to relax and have a break, so he did Seren's flea treatment and looked after him for a bit, then handed me a massive glass of wine Needless to say I feel better today. Bit of a rollercoaster this stage isn't it!
Re: Is this normal?! Don't feel silly about it please , I think many of us have had that " what the heck have I done " moment when it all gets too much, but truly you are doing well , it does get easier as a routine is established , but enjoy puppyhood too, it goes so quickly
Re: Is this normal?! Glad you are feeling more upbeat. I wont repeat what has already been said. It WILL get better. It IS perfectly normal.
