I had posted about six months ago and everyone was helpful and lovely so I'm hoping you can give some advice on my situation now. I've had dogs my entire life- most recently I had two small dogs before my labrador who both had health problems (one a diabetic requiring insulin shots twice a day and who we went through cataract surgery with and gave dozens of eye drops a day) and the other who had congestive heart failure and needed pills given three times a day. We have always been very devoted dog owners- but our lab has us almost to the breaking point. We have a 14 month lab and have made it through housebreaking, chewing and jumping up, and are even managing the barking- but the main problem is that our dog is still extremely rambunctious and often hurts either my husband or I by stepping on us, bumping us, and of course hits from the giant tail. This would be fine except that we also have a 3 and a half year old son who (although fine now) was born with a very life-threatening medical condition and has spent months in the hospital and has been through multiple surgeries. Although my son is okay now he is on the thin side and is not as steady on his feet as the average three and a half year old. When our two small dogs passed away within a couple of months of each other we were devastated and selected a lab because everyone told us they were the most gentle and best family dogs. While I know that my dog would never intentionally hurt my son she is so rambunctious that I can never have them in the same room together without a puppy gate between them. Today we had the dog and our son outside in the snow together and she basically rammed into him so hard that he now has a huge black eye and bruise above his eyebrow. The impact was so hard that I thought he might have a concussion. We love the dog but we hate our life with her. In the summer my son and the dog can not be in the yard at the same time because if my son is running and playing and we tie the dog outside with us she barks the entire time- or if we put her on a leash she chews it in half or pulls the entire time. So basically she's inside while he's outside and she's barking miserably; or he's inside peering through the glass while she is outside jumping up and destroying the screens on the french doors. The winter is even worse because she doesn't get as much exercise so when we do let her out she's even more hyper. It's a vicious cycle because she needs more training and socialization- but when you spend time with her you end up scratched, or with crushed feet so that makes you want to avoid her, which in turn doesn't help her learn. If I knew for sure that she would calm by two or three I would stick it out but now I'm beginning to worry that she may never calm. When I talk to the people who previously suggested labs as the ultimate family dog they laugh and say that labs are always crazy at worst and at best crazy until at least three. I worry that if I wait until three and she's still this way it will be impossible to find a new home for her. And I really want a dog that we can enjoy spending time together with as a family. All of our time with her is spent in worry of if our son will get injured. Ultimately I can't have her endangering my son. Had she hit him a little harder today we would've been in the ER with stiches or worse. I'm really at a loss. I knew that I would have to oversee the dog and my son but I had no idea that her behavior would remain this extreme past a year. And at this point my son who loves dogs is beginning to fear them- he is great about standing up tall with her and he works with us on obedience with her (having her sit and lay down, etc) but he's often afraid to pet her because he says she will knock him down. Should I re-home her now while she is still young and would be easier to place? It's heartbreaking to consider but right now none of us (including the dog) is happy. She truly has a wonderful temperament she just has NO awareness of her size or how to gently interact with others around her. Thanks in advance for any advice.
Re: Should we rehome our lab? Well, this is a tough one and ultimately, only a question you can answer, of course. I can see that you are having a difficult time with your pooch. I suppose your decision will rest on just how much more you can do to give your her the training and exercise requirements she needs. Do you have the ability to do some concentrated training with her? Take her to obedience classes? Hire a behaviourist to give you some advice? Take her to a doggy care to help wear her out? Hire a dog walker to take her out? Any or all of these things could help with her behaviour. She will calm as she gets older, but even at that she needs training. That being said, labs are big dogs who can pack a punch if they knock into a small child. There may be others who come along who have small children who can give you tips on how they cope. Good luck with this, it's hard. :-\
Re: Should we rehome our lab? When will your child be off to nursery/kindergarden/pre-school (whatever you may call it in your part of the world)? You will then have some spare time to focus more on your dog, if you are not working. Understandably, you are concerned about your child's safety but I wouldn't let any breed of dog alone with your child in the back garden - I think any dog would need supervision. Can you afford to get a trainer in for a couple of sessions just to show you how successful you can be and how quickly your labrador can learn? I would highly recommend it and you needn't carry on endlessly with the trainer; it would be a good investment. I suppose you then have to commit to time with your dog, whatever dog you have. If you re-home I think you may have the same problems with the next dog too. Can you join a dog club nearby? Make enquiries around the neighbourhood for someone who would enjoy taking your dog for his daily walk but can't have a dog of their own. It would be a shame to re-home but I guess you just have to see what is in your heart. If you decide to rehome then that will be the right decision for you and you shouldn't feel guilty about it but maybe you will find some inspiration from us to dig deep and feel more positive. Best of luck
Re: Should we rehome our lab? I'm afraid you dog is behaving like a normal young lab. She will calm down but there is no guaranteed time limit and training and exercise is the only way to get her to calm down sooner. There are lots of helpful training articles on the main website about training calm behaviour and dealing with a lively lab but training takes time unfortunately there is no magic wand I know I've looked. :-\. I have two very lively excitable labs who gave started to calm down but it's hard work and slow. If you don't think you can cope anymore then sadly re homing is your only option but only you can decide if that's best for you and your dog. I'd suggest looking at the training articles on the main website. Make yourself a training plan working on one area, for example teaching her not to jump, up stick to it and see if there is improvement. You might feel more hopeful if you can see improvement.
Re: Should we rehome our lab? Hi there, dogs and young children can definitely be a challenge. We have a 3.5 year old lab, a 2.5 year old little girl and a six month old spaniel who obviously all arrived in that order Lizzie loves our lab but finds the puppy too bouncy and nibbly even though they're always supervised so we sometimes have to separate them. Riley(the lab) definitely used to bump Lizzie when she was younger, we taught him not to push past through doors and to go to his bed when told. This reduced the amount of time he spent behind the baby gate in the kitchen. Sufficient exercise and training really helps too as this helps reduce their energy and demands for attention. It can be hard to fit this in but it's really, really important. Best of luck with your decision. Ps wear boots or substantial shoes while your pup learns not to trample on feet
Re: Should we rehome our lab? i agree with the other people who have replied serious amounts of exercise is vital off lead as much as possible my lab is 19months and sill pulls on the lead i do not even try to train this before she has at least an hour running free and i mean running she gallops around for at least 45minutes people who see her at the woods are amazed how much she runs and yes they are strong milly ran along at the beach and flattened me i had a very badly briused face but if you try to improve things and nothing works maybe you will have to rehome your dog as anything that may help wont be quick to fix good luck
Re: Should we rehome our lab? Hi there, so sorry you are having a difficult time of things at present. The truth is that only you can judge whether the situation is too dangerous for your child - and whether you have the determination to invest the necessary time into exercising and training your young labrador properly. Just waiting and hoping she calms down probably isn't the best strategy. A 14 month-old lab needs at least an hour's good exercise a day running around off lead, playing with other dogs, chasing tennis balls and so on. And a program of training that will help your dog learn the necessary steadiness and self-control that will make her the companion for your family that you want and need. As Jen said - there is no magic wand, only an investment of time, patience and perseverance will work. I think you and your husband need to consider whether you are prepared to put in all that necessary time and training, and if it is even possible for you with your family commitments. I am certain that if you do decide to keep your dog and to invest so much energy and effort into her, that you can turn the situation around, and with time she will become a loving and gentle companion. But if you cannot devote the necessary time for exercising and training her, then both for your family and your dog's sakes in my opinion you would be better trying to re-home her now, while she is young.
Re: Should we rehome our lab? I am sorry to read your sad post . I think the words " we hate our life with her " are the ones that made me instantly think that you may well be better off rehoming whilst she is still young . Labs are energetic , clumsy , overjoyed with all that life throws at them , but they also need much training to curb enthusiasm and channel energy . Yes, they usually make superb family dogs but they do require a lot of time, energy and patience . All I would ask is that you think hard and chose the right path, for all of you , good luck .
Re: Should we rehome our lab? I thought you might like to hear from someone who is very much in the same position as you. Molly is 16 months old and lively to say the least. I have a 3 and a half year old Granddaughter. And believe me, you worry more about Grandkids than you do with your own. Alicia, being 3 and a half, naturally squeals and runs around. What could be more attractive to an active, playful, friendly dog. Molly, being a Lab loves everybody, especially kids but has yet to learn that the bouncing, joyful greeting is not appreciated. About ten days ago I realised that no matter how much she careered around me, she rarely bumped into to me and that her jumping up was now more of a controlled lifting both feet off the floor and semi balancing. I know it sounds silly, but I reckon her brakes have improved a lot too. So she is learning control and calming down. Two days ago, taking all my courage in my hands I let Molly and Alicia into the garden together. I was out there with them and Molly had a short lead on so that if things didn't work out I could control the situation. I loaded the Buster Cube as I knew that initially Molly would focus on that. My 8 year old Grandson plays football with it with her. The I threw a ball around for Molly. There was lots of excited squealing and running around from Alicia and running around from Molly, but although they came close they never collided and I think that was largely down to Molly. You have no idea of the pleasure I have gained from being able to write this paragraph. I have been de-sensitising Molly for sometime by letting my Grandchildren hand feed Molly. I trained her to take treats to take gently from the flat of the hand. With the Grandkids she has been doing it through the open crate door. Writing this I realise how nuts that sounds, but I had spent a long time training this quiet behaviour and I knew that she would take the treat gently and that they would laugh when her whiskers tickled their palms. One of the first things I taught Molly was to 'give paw'. She loves give her paw and I stroke it and tell her she's a good calm girl and gradually this has become true. My lively Grandkids love this and feel so special when she places her paw in their hand and waits for them to stroke it. Funnily enough, I was only thinking this morning as I lay in bed how much she has calmed down since Christmas. On our walk yesterday she encountered a little yappy dog, bouncing uncontrollably at the end of it's lead who clearly wanted to attack her. I told her to sit and she looked at it with a puzzled expression. A bit later we met a large boxer who approached they even touched noses (both were on leads) and she didn't react until he let out a large woof and his owner intervened, Now a fortnight ago she would have reacted far more to the situation. Oh and Christmas reminds me. We had a tree and she left it alone. So NOT what I expected I think the girls are right, more exercise and training will help, a tired dog is a good dog! I think it must be very frustrating for her being either tied up or shut inside whilst she can she and hear all the activity and fun outside. Like you, I was totally unprepared for the boisterousness of a young Lab. I've long admired the quiet dignity of Guide Dogs, and Labs have such a good reputation with children, how could it go wrong. I think people with young Labs hide them Seriously, in the Autumn I was looking forward to the winter so I could walk her under the cover of darkness. I doesn't help that people think they are being funny when they grin and say "Oh, she'll came down by the time she's 5/6/7/8". I think it is very much up to us to help them to learn how to calm down. Many assistance dogs are Labradors. I don't think the very experienced providers of such expensive, highly trained dogs on whom humans are totally reliant would choose to train Labradors for this vital role if they were inherently over excitable until a ripe old age. I hope my experience helps you come to the right decision.
Re: Should we rehome our lab? I'm sure this is a big source of constant stress for you. My dog came to us because his first family couldn't keep him any more. They loved him very much, but one family member had a dog allergy. He was out in the backyard 80% of the time, he jumped, he bit, he pulled on the lead, he pulled on clothing, he dug in the garden. So his family advertised him for sale. Now he is with us and he doesn't do any of that anymore. The difference? We had the time and the ability to train him and keep him busy enough. He is a wonderful dog. (He still whacks with his tail and treads on our feet. Right now he's demolishing a toy seahorse in my lap. That's a Labrador. ) What I'm saying is that sometimes it can be in everyone's interests to rehome a dog to a place where they fit in better. It is perfectly reasonable and sensible for you to be considering this, given the situation. It is definitely easier to rehome a dog when they are younger rather than older. Are there Labrador Rescue organisations in your area who you could chat to about the options?
Re: Should we rehome our lab? Thanks for all of your advice. Our first step would be to contact our breeder who has the right to take her back if we decide to rehome her. He is lovely and may simply keep her or know of someone who wants another so it may be a simple (though emotional) decision. The hard part is that I have definitely seen a huge improvement in her behavior in the last few months. She no longer jumps up on anyone which is HUGE progress from when I posted six months ago. She gently takes treats directly from my son's hand and even sits/goes down for him when we practice obedience (of course with them separated by a gate.) She's smart and will chase her ball and drop it over the gate to the floor so that my son can pick it up and throw it again for her. When we first got her we had hired a dog walker for multiple times a day (one that EVERYONE in our neighborhood highly recommended) and quickly discovered (thanks to our alarm system) that she wasn't actually coming to our home when she said she was. Once she was texting me that she was walking my dog and the alarm showed me that she wasn't even at my house. Since then we haven't gotten another dog walker but we may look into that option or having a professional trainer come to our house and evaluate the situation and her temperment to see if there is anything else we can/should be doing. I feel that we definitely have to make a decision in the next few months because I don't want her to age out of being able to find a good home. And certainly if we rehome her our only new pets will be goldfish or canaries for quite some time. That thought makes me sad too, because I've had dogs (some times more than one) for forty years and I really wanted my child to grow up having those same companions- especially since he is an only child. I said to my husband yesterday that I didn't want my son to ever remember not having a dog- but sadly I don't want him to only remember being injured every time he is with our dog. :-\ Again thanks for all of your suggestions and advice- I'll weigh it carefully as we decide what to do.
Re: Should we rehome our lab? if you do decide to rehome your dog and the breeder can not help the blue cross has a very good scheme the take a lot of care to match up the dog and its new home you have my smpathy it is not easy we have a lot of problems with our lab who was 6months when we got her she is very good and quiet indoors as long as she goes off lead for at least an hour we have managed not to rehome her but had thought about before now as we are retired we do have the time she needs good luck let us know how you get on
Re: Should we rehome our lab? [quote author=newliberty link=topic=9640.msg139358#msg139358 date=1422191891] The hard part is that I have definitely seen a huge improvement in her behavior in the last few months. She no longer jumps up on anyone which is HUGE progress from when I posted six months ago. She gently takes treats directly from my son's hand and even sits/goes down for him when we practice obedience (of course with them separated by a gate.) She's smart and will chase her ball and drop it over the gate to the floor so that my son can pick it up and throw it again for her. When we first got her we had hired a dog walker for multiple times a day (one that EVERYONE in our neighborhood highly recommended) and quickly discovered (thanks to our alarm system) that she wasn't actually coming to our home when she said she was. Once she was texting me that she was walking my dog and the alarm showed me that she wasn't even at my house. Since then we haven't gotten another dog walker ... [/quote] Just wanted to say what a NICE dog she sounds like! How dreadful about the dog walker - who walks her now???
Re: Should we rehome our lab? Labradors are large, heavy, enthusiastic dogs. At nearly two my dog stands on feet, whacks people with his tail (really hard!) and certainly bumps into people. I'd say he is about averagely well trained for a pet Labrador. When he is playing with one of his equally large, heavy and enthusiastic mates on the Common, I have to watch it or I can get 60kg of two Labs crashing into me at knee height. I think this is life with young Labs, to be honest. I'm not sure that it sounds like it suits you or your family. I hope you come to the right decision for all of you. There is a helpful article here, which includes tips on finding the right training if that's the path you decide. http://www.thelabradorsite.com/giving-up-a-labrador/ Best wishes, good luck.
