When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Disclaimer: I love my husband of 20 years dearly....and he loves our dogs to distraction....BUT.... : : :

So 90% of the training of Bella is done by me...her basic care is done by me....and I could CERTAINLY stand to spend more time with actual focused training....but sometimes...I just want to throw up my hands! : :

Example 1: My post about Bella getting into the corn and consequently having very soft poo loaded with undigested corn. Clearly a case of hubby didn't watch Bella as she darted to the duck/chicken food pile and scoffed up the corn. And I'm the one who got to attempt to scrape up the mess off the public sidewalk. : I mean, honestly....she's a 5 month old puppy....approximately the same mental age as a 3 year old human kid...you can't just open the door and let her out and ignore her for 15 minutes while you go take a shower.

Example 2: The decision to try clicker training with her was a joint decision, but was initially HIS suggestion. So we get the clicker...I read up on here and other places about how to charge it up, how to mark the desired behavior, and begin the training process. Bella is a smart little thing, and we're doing well...she relates click & treat and is quickly learning new skills. It's all going well and I have clickers around the house and in my pockets and I "catch" her doing good things, so click and treat and praise. And then it happens.... :
Hubby has opened the door and let the tiny puppy outside to go potty....and shut the door. ??? And then minutes later goes to the door, opens it, and with clicker in hand.... click, click, click, click, click "BELLA...GET OVER HERE" Click, click, click, click "BELLA...COME HERE" ....click click click click click.
I try and calmly say...the clicker is not an attention grabber, it's a behavior marker....you mark the good behavior with one click and give her a treat. : If you want to get her attention, use a squeaky toy. He gives up clicker training....

Other random things over the past few months of course...and hubby thinks I read and research too much ;D and most of the time I ignore him...and he oh maybe twice a month does a session with Bella that goes poorly such as:

"BELLA....SIT....SIT....SIT....SIIIIT....SIT" with treat in hand...and when finally she plops her butt on the ground... "DOWN...DOWN....DOWN....BELLA....DOWN"....Still not having given her a treat of course.... : and when she finally flops down....and he gives her a minuscule piece of a treat he declares her "dumb and untrainable" :

Now mind you, I can grab a clicker and handful of treats and can on first(and only cue) she sits, down, stay, sit pretty, spin, and gets C&T each time. She just knows daddy doesn't follow the rules. ;D ;D ;D

But apparently I need to retrain hubby because last night he let her out when he went out to get a load of firewood, and she did not come right back with him. What does he doe??? Grab the clicker and do a million tricks trying to get her attention. : At least he doesn't dare grab my recall whistle...I might have to kill him if he tried that....

I guess it's back to the basics, time to charge up the clicker again so I can be effective in training the dog....and hope that hub doesn't undo all the progress I've made with Bella so far. :

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

;D ;D ;D Ah, many sympathies...my OH is the same....he once used a clicker as a noise distraction while Charlie was sniffing poo! ;D ;D ;D

But...I looked at it like this:

a) Change my 50 year old OH to turn him into a decent dog trainer...or
b) Adapt my training to cope with the fact OH is what he is....

Option b) is much more likely to have even a modicum of success! Plus, dog are easily able to distinguish the context, so I had to stop using my OH as an excuse...but banned him from using a clicker, whistle or dummy...and gave him his own pet dog cues (I guard my own like a state secret....).

Best of lick with it..

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Haha this is a priceless thread. My hubby is the same. What gets me is that he does no training, no feeding or anything but Milly dotes on him. She is basically his dog when he he is here. Lol I'm second choice. So funny.

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

My husband doesn't like dogs having nearly converted to a girl at an early age. Ok, I exaggerate slightly, he has a scar on his inner thigh.

I never thought he would agree to another one after Holly died. but after 6 months I plucked up courage and raised the subject. Had all my arguments lined up and what does he say "Well I,suppose you made quite a good job of the last one". Only it has to be a bitch (what I wanted) and a puppy ( got it right again)

Now we all know that pups don't train overnight. It is repetition, repetition, repetition. He goes down the pub with the old codgers, he is an old codger and tells me how to train her. This is basically the words of elderly countrymen who had rather harsher ideas. And it involves a lot of shouting.

I carry on in my own sweet way. Why change the habits of the best part of 50 years Molly learns her basics. But does he use it? NO. When he sits in the armchair and she tries to swarm all over him, what does he do. Try to push her away. Great game thinks Molly. I tell her to sit on her mat, she does. He tries to load the dishwasher, she regards this as a snacking opportunity. He tries to push her away. Another great game! I tell her to sit and load the dishwasher in peace.

My dog is smarter than my husband and much quicker to train

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Love this thread. This is totally my husband too! He thinks I'm on this site too much and can't make my own decisions on anything. He says mockingly "What does the site say?" on any issue. I probably don't help that cos I talk about different threads and he must get sick of hearing it! He doesn't feed, walk or train Rolo but like Milly I don't exist when he is home! Typical! We bought a clicker and I explained everything to hubby took the verbal sit cue away whilst we made the hand signal rock solid and I find him going sit, sit, sit, sit Rolo I said STOP! Got the clicker did the hand signal perfect sit hubby says I thought the clicker was for when he was doing something we don't want him too. OMG can you imagine the damage he could have done? When Rolo is jumping up C &T, when he is pinching things C&T it doesn't bear thinking about!

Sunsetpines I hear your despair and totally sympathise as if training wasn't hard enough as it is, add an incompetent stubborn male and it's trebled in complexity!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Empathise with you! Have a hubby here, he adores both Casper and Benson, but has different verbal cues, one is "stay" I don't use a stay cue. Bless the dogs, they tolerate him though, I swear Benson winked at me last time I spotted hubby using his"stay" cue! ;D

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Totally understand!

OH lets Tatze lick his ears and feet - yeuch! She gets away with so much more with him than me.

I was firmer with him when Gypsy arrived as she can't gain any bad habits - lo and behold she doesn't have any and is not licky at all!

I now wish I'd trained OH better when we got Tatze. My friend calls her a 'pampered princess' - too true!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Funny. We have no male contributors to this thread. I cannot imagine why

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Hrumph!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

That was awkward! Lol!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

[quote author=Hollysdad link=topic=9887.msg143560#msg143560 date=1423917941]
Hrumph!
[/quote]
And double Hrumph!!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

[quote author=UncleBob link=topic=9887.msg143639#msg143639 date=1423941085]
[quote author=Hollysdad link=topic=9887.msg143560#msg143560 date=1423917941]
Hrumph!
[/quote]
And double Hrumph!!
[/quote]

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

;D ;D ;D ;D

I'm so glad I'm not alone it this....and sorry to the well behaved husbands out there - many thanks to your wives for training you so well! ;D ;D ;D ;D

I took advantage of the beautiful weather here this weekend and did a bunch of training with Bella - mostly outside with recall, and a few random basic commands like sit, shake, etc when out and about in the great outdoors. Sure made for a tired Bella!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

[quote author=Mollly link=topic=9887.msg143552#msg143552 date=1423915736]
Funny. We have no male contributors to this thread. I cannot imagine why
[/quote]

That's what I was thinking!!!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

[quote author=Hollysdad link=topic=9887.msg143645#msg143645 date=1423942096]
[quote author=UncleBob link=topic=9887.msg143639#msg143639 date=1423941085]
[quote author=Hollysdad link=topic=9887.msg143560#msg143560 date=1423917941]
Hrumph!
[/quote]
And double Hrumph!!
[/quote]


[/quote]

;D ;D ;D

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

This thread brought a thought about our recall training. I suspect the little bit of work I have done using a whistle may be ruined. The OH and Isis frequently go hiking and I'm afraid that the whistle has been misused (repeated over and over again even when she found sniffing poo more interesting than returning to OH). So, I was wondering if I got a different whistle (that I kept to myself) if that would be a reasonable solution? And if that may work, should I sneak that other whistle away and dispose of it? Or do I let OH keep (mis)using it? They do have a wonderful time together, it's just not how it goes when I am with them!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

I would take the whistle away from your OH if he's not going to use it properly. A different series of pips might work but I'm less convinced that dogs care about the pitch, as I've seen my dog respond to a 211.5 and I always use a 210.5.

I'm not intending to be mean but your OH would probably be just as happy to just use his voice and call her?

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

My hubby is under STRICT instructions not to touch my whistle - end of discussion.

He doesn't prescribe to the "give the command once" theory AT ALL....in anything, which I can accept for most situations and just : and move on. He generally does treat after she finally does what he's asked for....but whatever.

I would take the whistle away from your OH and then go back a step of two in recall and strengthen the response... You could look at what he's done as an ineffective proofing response...he's attempted to recall her away from something she wants desperately, and instead of giving the cue once and then going and getting her when she doesn't respond....he's trying the cue again. It's a common error I think - and one made in frustration (been there, done that...but not with the recall whistle personally). You might want to spend some time training her to recall away from highly desirable items at home too, and then proof it out of doors if you think that taking the whistle away from OH is not possible.


As an alternative, you could encourage your OH to charge up a magic word that will work against poo sniffing...

Good luck!

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

Thanks for the replies. I'm really leaning towards taking the whistle away and then backing up. It was just hoping that maybe the whistle pitch might be a solution. I'm sure the OH will understand .

 

Re: When training the husband is harder than training the dog

This is such a problem...Flora is now highly skilled at playing divide and rule. Just one example of many: OH prides himself that he doesn't need to use a whistle (so at least that's not poisoned) but if I'm walking with her on the lead or training her on the line and he sees her from 50 yards away he'll whistle her just to say "hello" he doesn't really want her to come running . Madam of course thinks he's completely wonderful so will set off at full tilt ...not good ......grrrrrr.