Letting go

Discussion in 'The Rainbow Bridge' started by Nicola77, Jun 9, 2016.

  1. Dexter

    Dexter Moderator Forum Supporter

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    Hi Nicola,
    I hope the replies you've had have helped a little through this terribly tough time.Dexter is our first dog , so I've only gone through the upset of the shared loss of family dogs so far.
    I've seen one of our other Moderators Kate who has loved and lost many dogs write ,'Better a day too early than a day too late' that has always stayed with me and I hope that I'm strong enough to act that way when the time comes.We love them so much and have responsibility for them all their lives ,it's the last act of love and our responsibility To make sure they don't suffer. You and your partner have been very brave and I'm so very sorry for your loss x
     
  2. Anne123

    Anne123 Registered Users

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    Hi Nicola,

    I also say you did the right thing. Letting Charlie go is also an act of love. You both are devasted, I know, I have the same experience. Not so long ago, just a few weeks, we had to say goodbye to our Euan. He was 10 years, not that old. We went to our vet and he likes going to the vet. He was so proud that he was able to go with us to the vet and that we let little Finn at home. We found it inappropriate to take Finn with us for he would have taken all the attention.

    We felt we abandoned Euan. We cried in the evening together for being so harsh for Euan, at least it felt that way. We also wondered if we did the right thing....
     
  3. Newbie Lab Owner

    Newbie Lab Owner Registered Users

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    It's the hardest act of love to have our beloved pets pts. The pain, heartache and questioning ourselves afterwards is testament to the unconditional love that we have for them. Although hard for you to be sure at this time, when your emotions are all over the place, you did the right and kindest thing Nicola, for Charlie. RIP, lovely boy xxx
     
  4. KeithB

    KeithB Registered Users

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    Nicola,
    I can assure you that you've done right by Charlie. I have learned that dogs have a remarkable desire to go on for their loved ones. So much so that they will die trying to care for their "human". I believe they have this drive right to end. As ours draws near her end, though, an unexpected shift in the way I view my relationship with these magnificent creatures has occurred. It's given me a little strength. It's hard to explain clearly. I hope I can. I used to think of Sugar as my friend, buddy, pal. And she was mine. I cared for her but there were just as many times, probably more, that she cared for us. But lately as her end draws near, her body fails, her spirit tires, I've begun to feel more like I need to be her trustee. Her canine instincts won't let her stop so I have to make that merciful decision for her.

    I made the call today to the vet so my guts are churning and my emotions are boiling but I know that it's the right thing. She will end with dignity and no longer be in pain. The happy memories will outlast the doubt and remorse. Good luck with the journey, it's definitely not easy but what is life without feeling...
     
  5. Oberon

    Oberon Supporting Member Forum Supporter

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    Welcome, Keith. Sorry to hear that you have had to face this hardest of decisions on Sugar's behalf. I'm sure your thoughtful words will help others who are also going through or having to contemplate this.
     
  6. drjs@5

    drjs@5 Registered Users

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    @KeithB so sorry to hear this about your girl.
    jac x
     
  7. Lisa

    Lisa Registered Users

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    Thanks for your words, Keith. All of us have to face this sometime, it helps to think of it that way. So sorry you have to make that call but you are doing the right thing.
     
  8. charlie

    charlie Registered Users

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    Sorry to hear about your lovely girl @KeithB but it is the kindest thing to do for our best friends, as they can't :( Take care xx
     
  9. Karen

    Karen Registered Users

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    Ah that is hard Keith, but you know you have made the right decision for Sugar. :(
     
  10. Stacia

    Stacia Registered Users

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    I would just like to add one thing. Please, if you can, stay with your dog as it is being euthanised, I have always stayed and stayed upbeat and happy until the dog died, then I cried. So many owners feel unable to stay with their dogs and I have had to hold the dogs while they yearn after their departed owners.
     
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  11. pedrolo

    pedrolo Registered Users

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    Yes. It's our last loyalty gesture... they go to the rainbow bridge, feeling our love for them. Just loyalty. As they do, every single day of their lives.
     
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  12. Cath

    Cath Registered Users

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    So sorry Keith about your girl, but you have done the right thing for Sugar.
     
  13. BevE

    BevE Registered Users

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    Hi Keith,
    So sorry about the loss of your much loved girl. It is the hardest thing to do but our animals depend on us to make this decision for them. Some of my extended family said to me that it would be best if our golden lab, Cooper died in his sleep. It was my worst nightmare. I needed to be with my dog as he crossed Rainbow Bridge, in this way he knew he was loved so much and I knew he wasn't scared and alone as his time came. I understand that for some people this is just too hard to do, and that's ok,but for me the knowledge that he left this life quietly, peacefully and certain he was loved was a small comfort in the grief that followed his loss.
     
  14. SwampDonkey

    SwampDonkey Registered Users

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    I've always stayed with mine it is a last gesture of love for them they need us there I think. Its also for me about keeping a promise to them I give them everything I can thoughout their lives and its important for them to have an easy passing.
    It is hard and I do understand that it is too hard and too upsetting for some, but I need them not to be fearful and to make it as easy for my dogs(horses cats) as possible. I've had animals which have died in their sleep and its not so bad they just sleep away peacefully its not a hard way for them to go, it is harder on the person left.
    Everyone here clear loves and cares deeply for their dogs its nice to be able to talk to people who understand and don't think you are crazy because you care
     
  15. edzbird

    edzbird Registered Users

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    Yes. You've said it. That's bang on.

    Keith, it is a great thing you have done for Sugar.

    That is so sad. OH cannot bear to "watch her die" - it is not like that, I could not let my friend pass with only strangers. I hugged Scooby as he slipped away last year, and I stroked Belle yesterday - she didn't like hugs. I couldn't hold back the tears though, they flowed freely.
     
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  16. Cath

    Cath Registered Users

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    Oh Sue I know how you feel. Sending you Hugs xx
     
  17. Pilatelover

    Pilatelover Registered Users

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    Dear Nicola, you did the right thing. You have shown Charlie love and compassion all his life and now as he crosses over to the Rainbow bridge you have given him the love and dignity he needed in his final hours. I know it doesn't make it easy and yes the pain is unbearable. I wish I could say something to ease the pain I know there are no words. Sending you big hugs.
     

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