Puppy blues have hit

Discussion in 'Labrador Puppies' started by Sunshine86, Aug 30, 2019.

  1. Sunshine86

    Sunshine86 Registered Users

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2019
    Messages:
    30
    i know this is really common but just need to get it off my chest as my husband thinks I’m being ridiculous. I love our little Zeus so feel guilty for even feeling like this but I woke up this morning feeling so overwhelmed by it all. I can’t help crave my ‘old’ life. The kids would go off to school, I could work from home and still have my own free time. Now I feel confined by this cute little thing! Now don’t get me wrong I knew...I KNEW....this would be the case so I don’t know why I feel like this. As soon as my husband walked out for work this morning, I burst in to tears and that’s so unlike me. I know it’s a phase and there is no real point to my post other than to vent. Thank you for listening.
     
  2. Michael A Brooks

    Michael A Brooks Supporting Member Forum Supporter

    Joined:
    May 26, 2018
    Messages:
    1,508
    Location:
    Blackmans Bay, Australia
    Puppies are really hard work. Hang in there. There will be good times ... and bad. But things will settle. And then before you know it, they are gone. I miss every one one of my Labs. Enjoy the journey--it's an adventure.
     
    Saffy/isla likes this.
  3. SianMJ

    SianMJ Registered Users

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2019
    Messages:
    65
    Location:
    South Wales UK
    My other half and myself both had the puppy blues too ! I thought I had good dog skills but our puppy tested me ! Took us a while to love the little monkey, we felt guilty as she was just being a pup learning how to be and still is learning. Puppy blues took me by surprise as I’ve always had dogs. But she has won our hearts and she is now so much easier to live with at 7 months. I Understand your tears !
     
    Saffy/isla likes this.
  4. Sunshine86

    Sunshine86 Registered Users

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2019
    Messages:
    30
    Thank you for replying. I feel so silly that I feel like this...all the things I feel down about I knew was going to happen. The kids desperately want to play with him but generally ends in someone being bitten...normally my 5 year old. I knew this and have put measures in places so both the kids and the puppy have their own space so it’s stupid that I feel sad that the kids can’t play with him at the min. I knew I would be restricted on going out and having free time so again it’s stupid that I crave my own time. All my husband keeps saying is ‘you wanted a puppy’ which is true and I still do as I know once we get through this hard stage it will be wonderful for our family as it was when I was a kid. Sorry for moaning on...just one of those days!!
     
    Ian73 likes this.
  5. Michael A Brooks

    Michael A Brooks Supporting Member Forum Supporter

    Joined:
    May 26, 2018
    Messages:
    1,508
    Location:
    Blackmans Bay, Australia
    Don't apologise. We do understand the pressures of your immediate story. Not easy at all.

    One of the problems with small children and puppies is that children move their hands and legs very quickly. The quick movements ramp up the puppy's arousal level, which results in the puppy launching into play biting. Try (I realise the almost impossible demand of what I'm about to suggest) to get the children to deliberately slow down their movements. Get them to rehearse slow walks and imitating slow amost robotic movements with their arms and hands) without the puppy. Reward them. Then attempt a little bit of interaction with the puppy, Praise the children for slow movements. If the puppy begins to bite, then you should intervene and redirect the mouth onto a tug toy. Play with the puppy imitating that you are some prey. Let the puppy win.
     
  6. J.D

    J.D Supporting Member Forum Supporter

    Joined:
    May 9, 2019
    Messages:
    214
    Location:
    Hampshire UK
    Hi
    It is really hard work at the beginning but it does get easier. It sounds like you were prepared but the reality is worse. A bit like childbirth but you probably did that again!
    Make sure the puppy gets plenty of stimulation during the day. I thought you had to wait until after the second set of vaccinations to go to puppy classes and then found out you could go after the first. Take him out to places like garden centres where he can be socialised whilst you carry him around.
    Can you go to a local coffee shop to work for an hour or so to get out of the house? No matter how quiet you are in the house they know you are then and will want attention!
    The husbands comments aren’t very helpful. Try leaving the puppy with him at the weekend for a few hours and you might get more empathy!
    You will look back on this time in a few months and be saying the same thing to other new owners.
    Oh and take plenty of photos. They grow up too quickly.
     
    Saffy/isla likes this.
  7. Sjpalm

    Sjpalm Registered Users

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Hi there, I am going through the same thing at the minute, so much so that I went to the doctors, apparently it is adjustment anxiety, it is hellish. I've lost half a stone in 10 days! I don't know when it gets easier and I'm very confused by conflicting information by well meaning friends. I have considered giving the puppy back but if it came to the crunch I don't think I could do it!
     
  8. Sunshine86

    Sunshine86 Registered Users

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2019
    Messages:
    30
    Sorry to hear you are feeling like that. How old is your pup? I feel the same about not knowing when it gets easier. I’m hoping sooner rather than later. I feel guilty for feeling like this as I was desperate for a dog. How are you feeling today?
     
  9. Sjpalm

    Sjpalm Registered Users

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Hi there I'm feeling so so today, our wee guy is 2 weeks old and as cute as a button. Yeah guilt is weighing heavy on me because I broke my husband down for 14 months to get a dog after moving house that has a huge back garden. I'm back to work on Monday after 2 weeks of adjustment with the pup I have crate trained from the start, he sleeps in it at night bar pee/poo breaks but yelps during the day in it.. I hope he isn't like this when I'm at work... It's only 4hr shifts Mon-Fri, which means I'm not out all day. Any advice on how to pacify him or is he simply manipulating me?
     
  10. Sjpalm

    Sjpalm Registered Users

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    10 weeks old, typo sorry
     
  11. Henry Mah

    Henry Mah Registered Users

    Joined:
    Mar 26, 2019
    Messages:
    9
    puppies are overwhelming to say the least. It helps to have a support group and it sounds like your kids are too young and hubby has other priorities but we could be reading nothing into something. When we last fostered I had my adult kids as well as my wife and the foundations support group so many avenues to release and share. Perhaps see if there are potential play dates in your area so that you can share and unload sometimes. Takes a village applies to lots
     
  12. sarah@forumHQ

    sarah@forumHQ Moderator

    Joined:
    Oct 1, 2018
    Messages:
    193
    Don't worry, one of the wonderful things about dogs is that nothing they do is ever done with the intention of manipulating you. Manipulation is exclusively a human thing, and when your puppy yelps in his crate it is only because he's trying to tell you he wants or needs something - he has no idea how yelping makes you feel.

    The guides to crate training and raising a puppy when you work might be able to help you here (the latter focuses on people who work full time, but lots of the same principles apply).

    Good luck, and keep coming back to let us know how you get on.
     
    Edp likes this.
  13. Sjpalm

    Sjpalm Registered Users

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2019
    Messages:
    4
    Can I also ask, if dog yelps in crate for a few minutes is that a cardinal sin? I'm on other forums and apparently pups shouldn't whimper at all but how else do they learn? Crate training isn't working if he whimpers for a few minutes when first going in. I'm swamped with conflicting info. Just want someone to reassure me that I'm doing the right thing.
    I have 2 sons 10 & 6 and they are great with the puppy
     
  14. Sunshine86

    Sunshine86 Registered Users

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2019
    Messages:
    30
    Just wanted to say thank you to those that replied to me. I’m happy to say that I’m feeling much better. The biting is still crazy but I’m learning to deal with it better. Also in the evenings when he is super tired he is a very cuddly little boy. He climbs on my lap and snuggles in as close as he can get. I feel like we have such a good bond and I know once we get through the puppy biting stage that my kids will have a great bond with him as well. Thank you again
     
    Sjpalm, Henry77 and Ian73 like this.
  15. Poppy2606

    Poppy2606 Registered Users

    Joined:
    Sep 12, 2019
    Messages:
    36
    It gets a bit better as they keep aging ! I know how you feel though, although I haven’t had puppy blues, I cany imagine being without her. Sometimes it can be so difficult! The biting has been the worst part for us, she would bite us anytime we touched her from 8 weeks onwards (playfully) and only the past few weeks can we actually snuggle without biting, she does still bite but she has good bite inhibition now... that is until something triggers her excitement !

    Today has been really bad day, she got over excited and worked up or something on the walk and grabbed my hand extremely hard that I have really deep puncture wounds on it, and she seems to start biting me now when I tell her not to do things. I don’t know if this is the rebellious phase they go through? As she’s only 4 months and I thought that happened when they were about 8 months but either way it’s been a testing day! So I’m glad to near I’m not alone in feeling stressed.
     

Share This Page