Hi everyone. I just adopted my 13 week old black lab puppy. I have had a lab puppy before when I lived with my parents, but this is my first on my own with my fiancé. While she is absolutely so sweet, she is extremely attached. She will not do ANYTHING by herself and demands to be held at all times. On top of this, she will only pee inside on the mats and refuse to do it outside no matter how many times we go out. We are now on day 3 and I’ve called out of work 2 days in a row now. I am so depressed. Not only is it from lack of sleep, but I do not even have time to go the potty myself without her looking for me. I cry all the time, I have no appetite, and I have an upset stomach. I LOVE dogs but I’m beginning to think we made a mistake. My fiancé thinks I’m nuts and in time it will alll pass. While he is probably right, it’s hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. Anyone with advice or that can relate or did relate, please feel free to share. Thank you - one postpartum dog mom
Hello and welcome you are not alone, many feel like this at the start. Little pups are exhaustingly time consuming. If you look on the old threads, there are lots of similar posts. It does pass though. At 13 weeks she is older than when most people get pups at about 8 weeks which might account for her potty training issues. What has been happening before you got her ? What has she been taught as that might be why you are struggling ? My lab was pretty much house trained by that age but I had been on her like a hawk for about 5 weeks at the same point you are at. I would be bold and remove the mats ( if you mean training pads ) , take her out often and when she does go give her a massive treat, every time. She will soon get the hang of it. Good luck .
I hear you! I have cried and sobbed and thought that we had made the worst mistake of our lives. I have four children and a puppy is WAY more hard work than a baby! Whenever I walk the dog people stop me to say hello and have a pet of her (she’s cute, I can’t deny it!) and the thing which everyone who is a dog owner has said to me is that puppies are hard, they will test your last nerve, but it’s totally worth it in the end. This is what I cling to! Everyone I’ve spoken to said they felt the same - that they cried and stressed and thought they’d made a huge mistake. The fact that all of them have told me it’s not forever and it will get better has really helped. Our puppy suffers from separation anxiety and can’t be left for any time at all. Slowly slowly, she is learning that she doesn’t have to be at my feet all day every day, but I’ve decided that the easiest and least stressful way to deal with it is to follow her lead and take it really slowly. I’ve had advice to leave her to cry etc, but all that achieved was mess and stress for the dog and for me. So for now, where I go, the dog goes! If you have to leave your puppy to go to work then perhaps you could find a dog sitter/ doggy daycare so she’s not alone. Re the housetraining, our puppy was quite resistant to going outside and we had many many accidents in the house. She is now 18 weeks old and the improvement is huge... and with comparatively little input from us to be honest. Of course we take her outside often etc, but she learned pretty quickly after the first few days of getting amazing rewards and praise for toileting outside, that that was the way to go! She still has the odd accident, but I can hand on heart say that they’re always because we (usually my husband ha!) haven’t been on the ball and taken her outside when we should have. I agree with Edp to take the mats away... or at least just have one by the back door. I think that after a few days your puppy will understand the concept and your stress level will decrease hugely.
My pup was 6 months old before he caught on to peeing outside. I’m retired, so I’m able to stay home with him and give him all my attention and training. Even still, house training has been difficult. He’s almost 8 months old now and has an occasional accident, mostly excitement piddles. Every dog is different, so try not to feel too frustrated if you don’t think he’s meeting a developmental timeline. Puppies need the three Ps: Patience, Patience, Patience!
Don't worry, it is completely normal. I was so overwhelmed and exhausted I even once asked our breeder if he'd take her back - I'm glad he said no, as we would have so regretted it. It took me 6 months to warm up fully to our pup and get used to the new routine with her. She is pretty high-maintenance and a lot of work, but I see how much happiness she brings our family and I feel it is very worth it. It took us a while to get to know her and understand her, and once we did, it got very easy. We know what works for her, and what doesn't. As long as you're invested in your pup, you will get there for sure. Stay positive, and socialize your pup - expose her to various sights, sounds. She will pick up on your anxiety, so remain calm and matter-of-fact if she has a potty accident. I was so tense while potty training, I would not even shower unless my spouse also was home (I am currently a stay at home mom.) and I'd make sure I had eyes on my pup all the time as I was paranoid about stepping into a yellowing pee puddle. One day, I thought to myself, 'what's the worst that can happen' and took a nice long shower. Pup was napping calmly on the couch when I got out. I finally felt confident enough to start leaving the house for an hour at a time, then 2 hours without worrying about accidents. We taught Poppy to 'go potty' so she can now pee on demand. Remove the pee mats (you will have accidents, just keep the Nature's Miracle or pee cleaner close-by ) and massively reward positive behavior. Once she successfully pees outside, take her back to the same place every time for potty and when she does go, give her treats and make a big deal out of it. Also, invest in some treat dispensing toys, we like lickimats and kongs. Saved our sanity when we ate dinner at the table when Poppy was younger. Good luck, and the tough times will pass! Hang in there.
I completely understand how you feel! Me and my partner both felt this way when we got our little bundle at 8 weeks.. we struggled not having any kind of time to do anything.. he struggled more than me and my best advice is 100% keep talking about it! Hearing others stories may help you feel less alone! our boy is 7 months old now, my house is constantly dirty, muddy and messy! I don’t have a lot of time for myself and it’s still hard at times but I honestly couldn’t live my life without pies my pup! There would be a huge hole in my heart without him! before we got him I did so much research I bought books on labs and training labs and I read this forum years and years back to find out as much as I possibly could and things started to make sense when he came home with us and I started applying the training! Knowledge is power and talking will always help I hope you feel better soon and enjoy your pup they don’t stay small for long xxx
